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EmmyDammitEverythingIsTaken

Is this normal for second life?

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There is an explorer HUD sold on the MP that shows you where ban lines are on a region so you can avoid them,  This is not only useful for walking around but for use if you are sailing flying or driving a car.  Unfortunately there is nothing I know of to warn you about security orbs.  But the longer you are here the more you'll get used to things and be able to recognize private property that's not open to the public.  Generally that is land with houses with the yards that surround them, although many people just use a security orb to protect the inside of their house.

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5 hours ago, EmmyDammitEverythingIsTaken said:

I'm going to stay for a while and see how it goes :)

Glad to hear it!

I like your name; it would be a shame to let it fade away too quickly ;)

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Sorry to hear about your bad experience as a newcomer to SL EDET.  Yes you can either sit down on a seat, or ground sit to be completely immovable.  Also if you use firestorm viewer, you can press ctrl-alt-P to activate movelock, then nothing can move you from where you stand, you will however move very slightly but still stand on same spot. It can be quicker if you can't find a place to sit, or are trying to edit your outfit.  http://wiki.phoenixviewer.com/move_lock.  Also here is an old thread from this forum about the same issues that may hold some useful advice for you. 

 

 

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On ‎3‎/‎17‎/‎2017 at 4:40 AM, EmmyDammitEverythingIsTaken said:

Thanks Seana, Amethyst, I'm going to stay for a while and see how it goes :) I've always liked learning new things and I'm a bit of a perfectionist, or as my mother would say 'a pain in the butt' lol so I like to get it right. :D. It's not too bad with SL, you can keep a web browser open at the same time for looking things up. When I started I chose an avatar called Carla, I did try changing clothes and it seemed quite random what was happening. I went to a sim called Firestorm Gateway, it's in the destinations. There are people there that help out new starts. Someone gave me a run down of the avatar parts, like when you strip everything away, these are the essential bits that make an avatar. They showed me what alpha's do and the difference between mesh clothing and the normal ones. That made a huge difference, the randomness was gone. I think that was the starting point I needed. They've been really nice there, I went back again when someone gave me hair I really liked but a tiny bit of my scalp was bleeding through and it was driving me insane lol. They took me to a hair store that they used and showed me hair bases, a base that matched the hair colour was what I needed. I also found out about when something is 'rigged', they tried to get me to move the hair to get rid of patch of scalp showing through but it was stuck in place. After that I was quite happy to add and remove anything and I didn't feel like I was guessing. :)

I had a bit of an 'ah ha' moment yesterday. I bought a new animation and went to the sandbox to add it into my ao. The ao came with instructions on how to add animations so I've done that a few times now. It got me thinking though, so I dropped a few more more items to have a look at what was inside them, the same way you add an animation to the ao. I was finding loads of things, especially animations in the empty bags that clothes came in, so I'm gathering a bit of a collection of animations. I don't know if they'll be useful, but hey, I have them.xD My ah ha moment happened when I put a jacket on the ground, it had a file in it called maitreya autohide, it wouldn't let me open it but I could see the name. Maitreya is the name of the body I have. I had noticed when I wore clothes, the alphas would apply automatically. After a bit of googling it turned out that the autohide is how they do the alphas on the body. So I went back to the store, got their 'autohide kit', back to the sandbox, followed the instructions and made an autohide woo!:D It was almost exactly the same as adding an animation to the ao. I'm starting to see the similarities between a lot things in sl. The whole place is becoming less 'fuzzy'. :)

I did do a bit of wandering. I found a road as Maia suggested and started there. I was checking the owner name and descriptions. I didn't go into any houses, I did think they would would be owned by someone or would have a purpose. Unless there is a giant sign saying, come in! xD I think I wandered into somewhere I wasn't supposed to be. I got teleported back to my starting sim.  When wandering around like that, is there a way to know that I'm about to go on to private property? There was no warning and where I was, there was nothing obvious to show any borders.

I'm seriously impressed! You seem to be way ahead of the curve already!!! BRAVO!!

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On 15/03/2017 at 1:45 AM, EmmyDammitEverythingIsTaken said:

Hi everyone,

Can anyone tell me if this kind of thing is normal for second life...

I've been on second life for 14 days now. All I've been doing for the past two weeks is reading about how second life works and trying to get my avatar as nice as I can. I was just at the Da Vinci gardens and was on the marketplace looking for rings when my avatar starts flying around the sim. This I've seen way too many times already, so I figured it was some idiot and tp'd away. Then I get an IM,

[18:08] <Removed>: NOT your first avi! exposed on the blogs! Liar!

So now I know who started throwing me around. This is seriously doing my head in. I've had to change my profile to say how to search google to find out how to do things in second life just to show dressing yourself isn't difficult. I am being attacked and attacked and attacked some more and why, because I'm not a moron?? There is so much info out there on second life it's hard not to find what you are looking for in a few minutes.

Each day I want to use second life less and less. To me it's nothing more than the sims mixed with a chatroom. I get that it's more serious to other people but seriously, what is with these lunatics? They are everywhere!

Normally if I got harassed this much on something else, I'd just quit and move onto the next thing but I've already put a good bit of money into this thing. I've bought myself nice avatar parts, all mesh with the moving face and hands. I don't think it looks fantastic, I've mostly copied what I've seen in the stores advertising pictures.

This is really becoming a really horrible experience for me and I've barely started exploring. I have about 3 sims I go to (no adult sims), other than going to those places I sit on the market place and throw money away. 

Does this happen to other people or is it just me? Should I just just cut my losses and abandon sl? Or maybe wait a year and come so my nice shiny new bits are nice and out of date? I mean what do people normally do?

I admit I don't have a thick skin and sl might not be the place for me, I can't take what feels like a constant stream of abuse. I just asked the friend who introduced me sl what I should do or if there is anything I can do and she doesn't know, so I'm asking you.

Can anyone give me advice?

Ooooohhhhh you're far from being alone on this one; although I've been in Second Life since 2007, I can still clearly remember my first few weeks, and nearly quit several times, not least because of the attitudes of some people in certain places; oddly the so-called "welcome" areas/infohubs seemed to contain the types who were verbally or even physically abusive. I didn't mind being orbited; thought that was quite fun, but being caged or sworn at or insulted really made me feel I had landed in the middle of my old school playground!

And then some nice kind souls took me on board - rescued me in fact - and showed me some better places to be at, and shared some of the more positive aspects of Second Life.

The good news is, the majority of people in Second Life are not crazy (not in a bad way anyway :SwingingFriends: ).

I'd advise you to carry on exploring the many thousands of sims that are open to everyone, and make use of the mute/block button as necessary.  

If you are somewhere in world and shopping on Marketplace, just ensure you are sitting on something, so your avatar can't be pushed or orbited.  

 

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On 3/15/2017 at 9:58 AM, EmmyDammitEverythingIsTaken said:

I did consider getting renting a place but it was like 'Here is a place where people seem to enjoy giving me a hard time.... let's buy a house there!'. I know it's stupid because people can't really do anything to you, in that they can't harm you but it's become really frustrating and quite upsetting, especially when I've been trying to stay out of peoples way. :(

I love my Second Life rental. I live in a large residential/commercial sim (Lionheart). I've lived a few places, and for the most part no one has ever bothered me at home. Which is kind of sad, because I do actually like to talk to folks. Second Life has some property etiquette which is quite protective. People do not encourage going on private property or looking around people's homes. So I think that's part of the reason no one dares even say hello while I'm home.  If you are thinking about a more economic solution, skyboxes can be quite private as well. There are lots of security options you can look into as well. You might just want to try carving out your own little haven in Second Life. It might make you feel more relaxed in this world. It also solves the dressing room issue. 

Another thing I encourage is filling out your profile. Make it clear what you are okay with and not okay with. For instance, I make it clear in mine that I'm only looking for FRIENDS. This can help weed out some unwanted attention. Though it will be no help against griefers. 

Take the advice in this thread to heart and really look at what you might be doing to paint a bullseye on yourself. I travel around a bit and have been here for years and am very, very rarely griefed. I promise I'm not trying to victim blame. Griefers just plain ol' suck. But there may be some minor tweaks you can make that can make your Second Life experience more enjoyable. 

Snapshot_001.jpg

Edited by Nalytha
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I too wanted to send you a friend request inworld, but your profile was very clear that you wanted to be left alone, so I decided not to intrude, but to just try to assist, and wish you well here on the Forums.  I manage Cape Able, one of the 3 Virtual Ability residential sims, we sell land parcels to everyone, not only disabled.  *shameless plug, don't come for me, Forum-ites* :D  I do hope you're having a better time of it, and feel more comfortable.  

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On 3/17/2017 at 9:18 AM, Rhonda Huntress said:

Glad to hear it!

I like your name; it would be a shame to let it fade away too quickly ;)

Agreed. Few names make me grin. Emmy's is certainly one of them.

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Sorry for the late reply :)

Dante, I had seen that in the menu's, it makes sense now that I'm seeing how land is owned :) 

I've been using the movelock anytime I'm not moving around. Between what I've been seeing and what's being said here, I think it's the sim's I've been in. I was using the destination guide quite a bit and you find yourself visiting the same places over and over, I'm thinking that's what quite a few people are doing, I'm seeing the same names a lot. I've been trying to break away from that and use the search more. I've found quite a few places I'm going to go back to, they were listed as having high traffic but were dead when I was there, I think I've been doing my wandering at quiet times xD Marigold, I think you are right with 'welcome areas', I've always had someone at those places giving me trouble. I'm starting to think I'm painting a bullseye on my myself by being in these places. I guess the griefers know people go around those places and we are good targets because they can get away with it.

I found a sim I really like, a super relaxing place and it's moderated, I've not seen anything of trouble there. :D Nalytha, I'm thinking of rental a place, just somewhere to jump back to to try things out. I'll start small and work my way up. I did put 'rentals' into the search and it exploded with results, I'll keep looking through them until I get an idea of what is and isn't a good deal. It would give me something else to work on too :D

Sorry if anyone has tried to contact me, I've taken to leaving the 'only friends and groups can message' setting switched on and I changed my profile to a more 'leave me alone' one lol. It makes me look super antisocial, I'm really not! lol

My name...... Yeah I'm only slightly regretting that one, that was another frustrating moment lol. It sounds better if you say it really fast in a french accent xD

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When you go somewhere, check out their welcome area walls. Sometimes you will see groups and events and places listed. This will give you more updated, relevant leads because these are people who are usually actively advertising their places. You will come to see some names show up a lot and hopefully you can find some interesting things. 

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47 minutes ago, EmmyDammitEverythingIsTaken said:

My name...... Yeah I'm only slightly regretting that one, that was another frustrating moment lol. It sounds better if you say it really fast in a french accent xD

... imagines that, and swoons.

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As for whether there is a way to know when you are about to enter an area you will get booted from, I really am not sure, sometimes you get a warning first, it might be that you are not getting them for some reason, but I wouldn't worry about it to much. Being teleported back home isn't the worse thing that can happen, I get that some people want thier privacy, but if no one is in a house I have a hard time understanding why going in is such a big deal, put locks on your doors if you don't want me admiring your decorating skills while you are at work in RL, it isn't like I can steal your TV. I have only once had someone get upset with me for being in thier house, and I think that had more to do with the fact that I was in a skimpy bikini and his girlfriend showed up to. I sent him an IM, and a picture of his house that I took standing next to mine. And told him he shouldn't have a blimp on his roof if he didn't want people stopping by to check it out. He then sent me a friend request and an invitation to come ride his blimp with him someday.

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4 minutes ago, Talligurl said:

As for whether there is a way to know when you are about to enter an area you will get booted from, I really am not sure, sometimes you get a warning first, it might be that you are not getting them for some reason, but I wouldn't worry about it to much. Being teleported back home isn't the worse thing that can happen, I get that some people want thier privacy, but if no one is in a house I have a hard time understanding why going in is such a big deal, put locks on your doors if you don't want me admiring your decorating skills while you are at work in RL, it isn't like I can steal your TV. I have only once had someone get upset with me for being in thier house, and I think that had more to do with the fact that I was in a skimpy bikini and his girlfriend showed up to. I sent him an IM, and a picture of his house that I took standing next to mine. And told him he shouldn't have a blimp on his roof if he didn't want people stopping by to check it out. He then sent me a friend request and an invitation to come ride his blimp with him someday.

In my early SL, things like people in my house bothered me a lot.  I cared.  As time went on and I learned 'stuff', I just stopped caring.  I know some people do care, a lot.  My sim, Cape Able, has the residential parcels around the rim, and the middle is public land, art galleries, service center, etc, where anyone can wander.  Once people know how to look at 'About Land' to see if it's owned by an avatar, to get a clue if it's private, it becomes easier.  If I found someone in my house today, I might ask why but I wouldn't actually care.  

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I live in a residential sim and would be thrilled to login to see someone in my house. It would break the monotony. In my 'About Land,' I even make it clear that anyone is welcome inside. 

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1 hour ago, Nalytha said:

I live in a residential sim and would be thrilled to login to see someone in my house. It would break the monotony. In my 'About Land,' I even make it clear that anyone is welcome inside. 

That other thread seems to have an answer to that -- just make it open to a certain number setting your house as their home :-)

Edited by Pamela Galli

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2 hours ago, Nalytha said:

I live in a residential sim and would be thrilled to login to see someone in my house. It would break the monotony. In my 'About Land,' I even make it clear that anyone is welcome inside. 

Just curious, Nalytha, is your land also open to anyone to build?  And is your land on a mainland sim or private estate?  Curious about how other folks are doing things like this.  

Quote

 

 

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My home is on a private estate. I have it open to build but have auto-return set to 30 minutes. This is mainly for courtesy to my neighbors while I'm not there. 

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New account but I played SL extensively back in late 2015 until about mid 2016, so my opinion might count for something.

I did get griefed some, namely on - you guessed it, sandboxes! But for the most part in didn't phase me. Second Life really is a lot like life. You'll meet a lot of crappy people and a lot of great people. The difference is that on SL anyone can hide behind a computer screen so the amount of griefers/idiots/drama queens seems to be slightly larger.

If you aren't having fun then you won't feel any better by making yourself play. SL should be a fun recreation, not a chore or something you dread to do. So, if you decide to quit I understand -- HOWEVER, if you hold out with the faith you'll eventually find the 'fun' in SL and the great people, then I think you'd be doing yourself a favor. Just let the griefers roll off your shoulders and keep exploring and doing you, that would be my advice. SL can be wonderful if you do so. 

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Hello Miss EmmyDammitEverythingIsTaken,

 

I have to say, I LOVE the name, I was thinking of doing something similar when I started less than two weeks ago as all the common names were already taken.

I hope things have improved for you since you started and hopefully you are starting to enjoy your SL experience.

 

Sometimes to lose the crazies, it’s good to find a crowd J  easy to avoid their gaze. When I started, I was having a bit of a hard time meeting people using the destination guide as everywhere listed was almost always empty.  So I did a search and found a somewhat effective way to find Sims that still get regular visitors.   Thankfully these Sims also seem to usually have moderators on hand to deal with bullies and crazies.

If you use the following search (you can put it into your normal web browser and it should work fine), it will sort the SL destination guide based on how many people visited that Sim in the last little while.  This is a good way to find places you can go to meet others or just show off the awesome Avatar you have created. 

http://vwrsearch.secondlife.com/?query_term=%251&collection_chosen=places&isLeftColOpen=true&sort=popularity_desc&category=

Please note, this is not my work. *entering giving credit mode* I found this link from the forums and it was posted by a member named Freya Mokusei back in 2015 but it still works today (I use it often to find new victims *ahem* friends I mean).

Link to the original posting

https://community.secondlife.com/forums/topic/325440-is-it-possible-to-search-for-sims-with-the-highest-population-at-the-time-of-search/

 

 

Having said the above, please note, as a fellow newbie, if you do need help with crazies, please let me know. I’ll be happy to join the angry mob of newbies *insert scene of black and white movie scene of angry towns people with torches and pitchfolks rushing towards the windmill*.  for those with a very visual imagination, this would be a great time to use it for some LOLs.  newbies with pitchforks. we might just impale ourselves LOL.

 

Being new to SL myself, I’ve met some amazing and friendly people that have been helping me not run into walls and learn how to not walk outside without my pants on.  SL is very fun if you are in the right sims.   

Please note, if you join one of the ‘families/clans/groups, they usually have a friendly base of operations where their members can open boxes, change, and generally it’s a protected area where members of the group cannot enter.  This can help you to have a safe place without paying high rent or spending money. If you haven’t found a place, please msg me in game and I can suggest one or two.

 

Also, please feel free to msg if you would like a small list of sims I’ve found already that are currently active and protect their visitors from crazies.

 

Btw, if you love the avatar part and the dressing and shopping, I know a great group of folks that would love to meet you as they are amazing at finding deals, looking good and are super friendly.

 

Hopefully you have found a good group of friends, otherwise message and I can introduce you to some (slightly wacky) fun people.

 

Remember, SL is WAY more fun if you have some friends to explore and chat with.  LOL if you want to not chat, it’s ok..i know of places where you can have your own closet for quiet times LOL.

 

Take care and Smile,

from  a fellow Newbie

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One of the more interesting threads we have had in awhile :D.   It took me back.  

One thing not mentioned (at least I don't think so as this WAS a long thread so far) is that "old age" does have its perks LOL.   I doubt very many of us old timers have issues any longer. Guys (or gals I guess) will come up and hit on you now and then but most often in a polite way. Not a big deal. So getting OLDER is good :D.   

The only place I ever ran into griefers was in the sandboxes, so those aren't the best to hang out in if you are new (hence targeted as in theory you are easier prey). 

I suggest that you find a home. Searching the rental listings (and sometimes the forums) will likely find VERY cheap almost free housing --- or sometimes free for new folks. It will likely be less than picturesque but a starting place. Since you love to learn (and I so get that as I spent two days in the induction area (no longer around) when I joined, reading all the signs and practicing stuff) you should also really like exploring possible rentals. It would be VERY unlikely to run into greifers while house-hunting. I go out and look at land and rentals from time to time still just for fun and to see what is out there and how things have changed.

To PAY for said super cheap rentals (some are $25 a week) I suggest going over to Linden Realms and picking up crystals. Now you MIGHT run into griefers there but most have HAPPILY been negated by the security now in place -- so unlikely. You can't make lots of lindens there now like you used to but you can collect crystals by running through them (orange is best unless you happen to see a VERY RARE THESE DAYS blue or green). You turn these in at a collection hut AND along they way you definitely learn how to navigate your avatar better. So fun too.   

Since you presumably haven't been to the Realms before you may be able to go on the quest (I am not sure if it is working now but guessing it might be fixed). If you get a note on your screen when you enter just follow the instructions. The whole point of the quest was to help new folks learn the SL ropes.   You can find the Realms in the Destination Guide. 

 

Along with MUTE there is also DERENDER which is a handy right click option LOL.  

 

Good luck and have fun. 

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A separate note to say how NICE it is to see some Lindens commenting in the forums these days.

Thumbs up!

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Well, one thing I would say is that if your inworld avatar has the same name or kind of name as your forums avatar, that could be a turn-off. People react to names that seem negative some time.

I would not give up on Second Life but I'd definitely get away from those 3 sims and try a whole bunch more, not always in the adult category, try all kinds of things, live music, shopping events, city sims that are replicas of real life cities, interesting Destination recommendations, etc.

Also, when you are working on your avatar, i.e. editing clothing go somewhere out of the way so that people don't attack you then or get mad at you doing this (some do). For example I have little rooms at the infohub in Ross just for that reason. You can look under "hangouts" and other terms to find quiet sims where this should be possible. 

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On 3/15/2017 at 4:47 PM, EmmyDammitEverythingIsTaken said:

I had a look at the world map, I didn't realise how big it was! :o That's one thing I'm not too sure about, how to navigate the world? Do you just click a place on the map and choose 'Visit this location', I mean, are you allowed to do that, drop into an unknown place? I hear people talking about places and often wonder how they know about these places, how did they find out about it, how does news travel here.xD I've found Luna, Furball and Pooley in the websearch inside the viewer, I'll take a look at them. I'll do some reading up on how renting/buying works. 

Second Life is huge. You can just click the map. If you drop in some place where a homeowner doesn't want you, they will have a device that ejects you from their place. No big deal and nothing personal. You just get teleported to your "HOME", wherever you have set that to be. There are numerous places that will allow you to set their land as your home.

The ToS has no restriction on where you teleport. There are ban lines to keep people out of private areas. There are areas where you must be a group member to get in. Other places require you be over 30 days old or have financial info on file. It is mostly on the property owner to keep people out. We generally have no idea where we are or aren't wanted.

The Destination Guide (in-viewer and on the web) is full of places that people want you to come to.

Figuring out where to go that is fun or interests you is challenging. There are blogs that function like a travel guide.

There are a number of groups on Flickr that are focused on PLACES in Second Life.

Second Life is very much like the real world. Everything you find in the real world and then some is in SL. How you behave in the real world should to a high degree transfer into SL. But, there are regional cultural differences, diversity. So, you do have to be come much more aware of cultures unfamiliar to you. Unintentional transgressions are not against ToS, but they may piss people off. Apologise and move on. Intentional transgressions can violate the ToS.

Innocent mistakes in SL do NOT carry the death penalty. Have fun. Thicken your skin and use the mute button. 

 

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I don't know if this has been suggested or not,but keeping a well organized inventory will save you tons of time and frustration..

If there is one thing that I wish I would have learned early on is,how much of a bottomless pit our inventories can become..

A good filing system with directories and sub directories can do wonders..

It's just amazing how quickly inventory can get out of hand and unorganized..

Every time I take a break and come back,I'm reminded of just how lazy I became with my inventory the last time I was here.. hehehehe

There is a system in there somewhere..I just have to remember it..I tend to over complicate my filing system sometimes and end up saying I'll catch it later..

six months later and I'm lost as can be as to what I even bought the last time in.. :$

 

If there is one bit of advice I could give it would be,make a system that is easy for you to get around as well as easy to manage..

Also have a drop folder for when you are shopping that you can throw things in as you buy them..for me it just makes it easier to later sort through my new things back at the house..

Plus it's kind of like ,fashion movie montage time, just enjoying trying the stuff on in my own home to my music,maybe dancing to put them to the test .. hehehe

 

Anyways,I just thought I would drop in a tip or two..

Enjoy your SL..I envy that,checking out all the new stuff feeling, you have going on right now..Such fun years..:)

 

 

 

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