Privacy help

[Jacklyn Zarco]

Sometimes I just want to be by myself and go to a quiet sim and just listen to the music alone. I uncheck my friends list so they cannot see I am online. I got a message from a friend that they noticed I did this to them. I told them the reason I do it. I am curious if anyone can tell me how this person knew I did this? Can we ever have total privacy at times in SL?

[Freya Mokusei]

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Jacklyn Zarco wrote:

Can we ever have total privacy at times in SL?

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Maybe, but probably not. Only vaguely possible by rolling an alternate account - adding no friends, telling no-one about it and taking active precautions against revealing yourself to alt-detection systems.

One mistake and you'll probably have to roll another, however.

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Jacklyn Zarco wrote:

I am curious if anyone can tell me how this person knew I did this?

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Few oracles, most notably IMs which don't respond with Offline messages. Or last logged in dates. Or LSL scripts testing AGENT_ONLINE.

Second Life was not designed with privacy in mind. My strategy (as an award-winning introvert) is communication - "I am busy/not interested. We'll catch up soon but for now, go away." Those who don't manage to live up to this simple rule get removed from my list.

I find this works as a natural filter - anyone who deals in drama is quickly removed, giving me even higher odds of successful 'alone'-time.

Good luck.

[Bobbie Faulds]

If they are in same groups you are and the group has less than 5K members. you can see the list of members and their online status. Best to go the alt route.

[elliedonut]

If you unchecked the 'Friends can see when you're online' box, that friend can see that you have unchecked them. I've had that happen before where I wanted to be left alone, and was then questioned by the friend why I unchecked the box.

[Brenda Liotta]

One effective way I found is IM someone you know is offline with a simple "Hi!".

The response will be User not online - message will be stored and delivered later.

 

Cut and paste that into the autoresponse box (located at privacy settings) and then in Online Status (in the Comm section, top left corner in Firestorm), check "Autorespond".

Check off all those you wish to be not bothered with (on your friendlist) and jam with your music.

You can catch up with those you recheck as showing online again later

You must uncheck Autorespond upon your return to being social or all IM's will get that response.

[Amethyst Jetaime]

Friends should respect your need for privacy.  IMing someone to ask why yuo unchecked them is not doing this as they obviously feel you should be available to them all the time. 

You are not required to respond to IM's immediately.  You can IM such friends back at YOUR convenience and tell them you do that when you need privacy and please respect that.

People who don't respect my privacy are removed from my friends list, as a real friend will always do this.

[Jacklyn Zarco]

Thank you all so much. You all gave me something to think about.  

[Bitsy Buccaneer]

I don't go in for just ditching people who don't play by my rules, so I used to use an alt account when I needed time alone and just wanted to wander around looking at gardens and pretty things people had made. (RL work was long days at that point because we were helping a family in the immediate aftermath of a suicide and when I got home words and television and chatter were the last things I needed. A while of not thinking in calm surroundings helped me recharge for the next day and made a big difference.)

Building on an alt didn't really work for me though and I've found that the majority of friends would only IM a couple of times before they just stopped initiating contact if I said I was working on a project. (Which meant the onus was on me to keep trying to find a time when they were free, and generally failing.) I have three now who are both respectful and resilient, which is great, but I wonder if some of the other friendships might not have been cut a bit short.

Alts can be misused, but there are genuine uses for them when people want to use SL for different things, whether it's building sometimes, being alone or socialising.

[Bobbie Faulds]

I have alts for genuine uses. One is my banker. I keep most of my Lindens on her so if I want to buy something, I have to decide if I want something badly enough to log her on to get the money. I RP and I'm an admin on the main sim I RP on. So I have alts I use as NPC's for RPs in the sim. 

Sometimes I like a different style of RP than what we have where I play and it would be rude to go onto another's sim on that avi. So I use alts for different RP style. Their inventory reflects the RP style, which helps keep the inventory on my main down some. They have totally differentl looks from my main and I play differently on them.

I also have one that I use when I want to just explore what SL has to offer so I won't be bothered. Her only friends are my main and the money alt. The groups she has are for like Immersiva, Bryn Oh's interactive artwork sim.  I can log in on her and just explore when I need quiet time. 

 

[Rhonda Huntress]

I have an alt -- or rather had an alt -- but she is never online any more.  When she is she tells me things that make me wonder.  I think she has an alt of her own and she's hiding from me.  I'm thinking about creating an alt to try to catch her with her alt on that one.

 

 

[SINGINGIT2YA]

SNEAKY!!!!~!~