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SL and the toilet catastrophe


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I returned to SL yesterday for the first time in 2 years. I'd heard that much had changed - including the removal of casinos and gaming centres from mainland.

As I explored a number of sims - many of them in my list, and now dead - I came across what looked like abandoned land. At the end was a building, constructed in fullbright gold. I entered and was surprised to see a number of functional arcade machines - including 7Go and Zyngo.

Most of the machines were offline but I found a couple, towards the southern part of the building, that were marked as Freeplay and still had titles active. Barely thinking, I clicked on one - and the game started! I was told I had to beat 39,000 and on my first attempt I hit 39,786 - the machine then paid me 10L!

I was pleasantly surprised, so decided to click it again. Obviously, the owner had forgotten to take all his machines with him, and this one still had some Ls stored inside. Well, I thought, if anyone's going to access this money, it might as well be me! His loss would be my gain! So I played again, and won another 10L.

Two hours later, I had nearly 2,000L in my account - the machine was obviously well stocked. I felt a bit of fear as I realised I might be breaking TOS, but this was free money for nothing! I also desperately needed to go to the toilet - I had eaten a huge lunch of fried bacon, sausages, eggs, toast, baked beans, black pudding, fried liver and mushrooms, and was now in need of a poo.

But I didn't dare leave my screen - what if someone else found this casino, and took over the machine while I was away? It would be negligent to leave now, even though I was at the 2,090L mark - but I did desperately need to void my bowels. However, greed kept me glued to the screen. 10 minutes later, I was pushing close to 2,130L and it seemed the machine wouldn't stop paying out.

An hour later, I was at 3,010L and stamping my feet on the ground, almost dancing in my chair, trying to avoid the toilet. With every game, I promised myself - "One more payout, then I go the bathroom". But I was terrified another AV would come in and deny me the machine - taking my place - and who knew how many other hundreds...thousands of Lindens were to be won, in what might be a one-off opportunity?

I was heading for 3,100L when it happened - I lost control of my bowels. In fact, the sensation was so violent, it felt like my neck had cracked open, with an invisible fist smashing down on my head...a painful sensation that soon turned to pleasure as the tight, sharp tension left my bowels. Then, in horror, I realised that I had soiled myself. So powerful was my accident, I could feel excrement dripping down both calves into the carpet, and realised I had purged my bowels' contents through my jeans and into a small, brown, foul-smelling puddle in which I was now mired in the sofa.

I had to remove my jeans, which only spread the muck further across my legs, and it took two rolls of toilet paper to clean myself up. Unfortunately, whilst pulling off my jeans and getting up from the PC, I smeared some excrement over my keyboard and monitor, which I then had to clean up with baby wipes. I had won 3,090L, but the cost to my RL had been severe. The jeans were totally ruined, even after washing them, and the brown stains on my carpet and sofa remain, despite treatment with water, salt and soap.

Has this happened to anyone else?

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