Is it abuse to be a male in RL playing a female avatar in SL?

[Deanna Moonwall]

If there is a male in real life playing a female in second life, what actions by this female avatar could be considered abuse?

[Yichard Muni]

I must confess I don't understand these replies. I say "people feel that " and you replied as if it was MY opinion... we are not in the TV :-)

[Unklebob Hotaling]

no worries, i'm sure you explaining that we're not inside tv's will go far to smooth things over.

[Deanna Moonwall]

Thank you for your response, I did receive the answer to my question. 

[Jacquelin Seisenbacher]

Okay, I haven't hand an honest to God soda through the nose moment in a LOOOOONG time, Thank you for that!

[Jacquelin Seisenbacher]

No, not against the TOS, and not abuse.   If you use the gender of your avatar (male or female) to dishonest ends, that also isn't against the TOS, but is definately not okay.

 

The really amazing thing, to my mind, is that since we can be anything or any gender, our real person shows through more.  That isn't to say that if you use a female av, you are either affeminate or a perv, there are sooooo many other reasons (the ability to find clothing is a good one), but it does say something about you.  Don't worry, it's probably good

[Unklebob Hotaling]

Hope it didn't happen during Christmas dinner with the family.

[Catherine Cotton]

lol heck no!

[TessaFae Gackt]

I have had an issue in the past where my avatar was dating a male avatar only to find out later on it was a RL female playing the character. Sad part of it was, the player of the male avatar had misrepresented themselves, even so far as to send pictures of their RL husband, claiming it was them in RL. I was led to believe in was a RL male playing a SL male and fell in love....only to find out later on it was a woman in RL and it hurt...ALOT. Even after finding out the truth, I tried to stay friends with the person, but there are just some things you can't forgive when your heart has been hurt.

 

Is is abuse to play the oppsitie gender of what you are in RL in SL? No. Is it fair to misrepresent yourself and hurt someone's feelings? Hell no.

[Daria Afterthought]

THERE IS NO GAY,

IF ITS PRETTY SCHTUPP IT!

[Pussycat Catnap]

Deanna.Moonwall wrote:

what actions by this female avatar could be considered abuse?

 

Its only abuse if they're on a Frankenbarbie: over 6', DDD-boobs, hips at 0, waist at 0, torso length at 0, leg length at 100, arm length at 0, hand size and foot size at 0. Bling everywhere, and blond... and it doesn't matter if its a man or woman playing that AV. (I wish it was abuse...)

- But if that were actually abuse, 90% of SL would get AR'd.

[Clint Maggs]

It's SECOND LIFE so I say be who you want to be and have fun. 

I'm the same in RL and SL but thats my choise. Unless you want to be a 'pregnant child vampy av that biteS" (Haha UnkleBob)

[Veronika Larsson]

If it is, we'll have to file Abuse Reports against 75% of the residents in "lesbian" or "women only" clubs, not to mention 85% of the escorts in Second Life!

[Veronika Larsson]

That exact quote should be in the Terms Of Service

[Clint Maggs]

Oh no....I'm busted

[Unklebob Hotaling]

"Oh no....I'm busted"

So was I once, mind you it was a crossdressing event (assuming being ruthed don't count)

[Clint Maggs]

That was you?  eeeeeek   Well, I had a great time that night

[Unklebob Hotaling]

omg, high praise indeed!  Usually they say "That was you?  Well, i had a great time anyway."

ps, i think i lost something in your couch, doubt you want to find it though.

[Tesla Tripsa]

Actually the bleaches used to make those sock white are toxic as well.  Best to go with organic socks, they'll come in colors that are safer than those white socks.

[Ren Azalee]

Like others have said, not an abuse... thank goodness, as it's something I do frequently.

On the other hand, what WOULD arguably be an abuse is if the person in question isn't open about their RL gender, and you go spreading it around. Spreading someone's RL info is against the ToS.

[Cazzandra Zane]

*blinks and tries to be serious here then falls out on her back laughing* I know so many think this question was a crazy one to ask but come on everyone has to agree it got some good laughing responses. As to my personal thoughts on it...no it is not abuse to rp an opposite sex that what you are in rl. It has been happening for as long as there has been chat rooms on the internet. For one reason or another, and to agree with Eternus, it should not matter unless that relationship found in virtual space is going to be moved to rl.  THEN it becomes something that drastically needs to be discussed for the sake and sanity (and safety) of both parties involved.

I myself have two male characters that I get on sometimes in world and run around goofing off on, have they been romantically involved, in virtual space yes, crossing to real life no.  If I thought at all that other person was getting "overly" attached I would seperate from them and explain why..sometimes it went badly other times the person appreciated that I seperated before it grew any further for them.  I also have two female characters, and I am the same with them as I am the male avis. It is not abuse to play the opposite sex the abuse comes when you allow things to progress to far to fix without telling the other person the truth.

[Daria Afterthought]

Necromancy is bad mkay.

[DR Dahlgren]

Back in '07 LL posted some statistics about gender in SL and it was thought then that about 30% of the female avatars were actually men. Now I do not pretend to understand all the motivations behind this, but one comes immediately to mind.

In RL, in many countries, it is perfectly allright for a woman to dress as a man. Pants, T-Shirts, Business Suits, etc. Women can participate in activities that are considered male without any real negative impact as well. Of course, carried to extremes, they might be labled dykes or butch or something, but generally it's not considered to be socially unacceptable. So women may experience the world from a male point of view without much trouble.

Now turn this around, have a guy put on a cute skirt and hit the streets. He won't get a block without being harrassed. Yet here in SL a male can put on a female personna and, within the limits of SL, experience the world from a female point of view. Maybe if more did it, there would be less "Hey, would you have S*x with me" comments. (Though frankly I guess that is a silly thought. LOL)

________________________________

[Veronika Larsson]

Doc, I agree it might not be a bad experience for men to see what it's like to be a woman, even for a bit.

 

As for women in RL being treated like men just because we wear pants or "business suits"--think again!  I am treated as a woman, with all the good and bad that implies, no matter how I dress.  If you think I've experienced "life as a man" because I wore a pants suit...think again

[Daria Afterthought]

In San Fransisco, a man can wear a dress and pumps without hassle.

[Monderas Bristol]

Daria.Afterthought wrote:

 

In San Fransisco, a man can wear a dress and pumps without hassle.

Maybe I should emigrate...