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Looking for a hangout


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I have a dilemma.  My SL avatar is not me.  I'm not involved in any RP sims or groups, but I am in world as someone else.  But when I go out to mainstream clubs and hangouts, it's always the same old lines: "Where are you from?" etc.  Is there a hangout that caters to role-players, where "characters" can go hang out and just be "characters" without having to worry about being "real?"

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Interesting post. I was drawn to it cus it very much sounded like something I would have posted once. I would say, how much or how little "real" you are is up to you. You cannot wait for someone else to tell you "its alright to be someone else". Instead "just do it". Post something on your profile like "It's ALL roleplay" or "!st life? What's that" on the 1st life tab and have at it. Tell about who it is you are in sl on the sl tab just like you would if that were your rl.  Dont  compromise when you talk to people. Dont be pushed outside what you've said on that sl tab. Just live it. A good part of not running into issue will lie in what kind of people you befriend. People who DO rp  (live in rp towns, go to rp schools, are rp docs) will have the easiest time just accepting what you present without "so where do you live" or "do you really look like your av" stuff. The people I choose to socialize with have in fact NEVER asked all that. My "life" is the one I've lived out here. Yes there's divergence from that if you "actually" get into some kind of super close relationship where its not all rp but that should actually be rare and exceptional. I dated several people, never was anything rl brought up. There is only one person inworld who is rl also in his roles with me and that is based on a looooong and winding friendship and subsequent bond. Your friendships should you be blessed and make them will be real friendships because the people behind the avis are real and when undertaking friendship, even if a/s/l is never divulged, SOME quality of the person is revealed (intellect, they're funny, they're stoic, likes to be the wild child) or there is no friendship. Otherwise you just know a bunch of people who know how to live their character and don't like them OR the character.

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Are you just not interested in answering anything related to your real life or are you a real fulltime roleplayer? Because there is a huge difference between both. Is everything you do..."fake"? is everything you express part of a fictional character?

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If you're going to be a roleplayer, be a roleplayer and answer as your character. Otherwise, use humor to answer such questions. Even in RP sims and locations, the same questions come up OOCly, though usually via instant message. You probably can't avoid them completely, but you can change your perspective on them and how you respond.

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My avatar and her personality are the SL adaptation of a RP character that I've been developing for over six years in another game.  In SL, things have worked out that the personality is about 50/50 her and me.  I simply want to be taken as I present myself.  I have no problems talking about RL stuff with someone I become friends with, but when I'm out on my own looking for a dance, etc., RL questions from complete strangers suck because I don't know how to answer them.   I'm not there.  She is, and her "RL" is just another fictional life.

I've found these forums are not at all representative of the people in the places I frequent in-world.  People seem to agree with me here, whereas in world, I'm surrounded by people "playing" themselves and expecting the same from everyone else.  Those people on the forum that say "I take people as they present themselves," where are they in world?  Not where I hang out, for sure.  

Syo, you used the word "fake," and that is the crux of my problem.  Who I am in-world, while not me in RL, is not "fake."  That part of me that is "her" has feelings, moods, etc, and it is that stigma of "fakery" that I'm trying to avoid by finding a place to hang out where I'll be intrinsicly understood.  

I sense this really wouldn't be a problem if I was the same gender as my avi, but I'm not, hence the strong need to be accepted "as is."

 

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I occassionally hang out at Help Island. There are a regular group of people there who I chat with. None of them ask about my personal life and I never ask about theirs either. 

Over time I have got to know where most are from and the sort of age group they belong to, but that is because of stuff that is spoken about in local chat, so you have the choice to add a little about yourself if you wish, or not, doesn't seem to make any difference.

Of course, that doesn't stop the random IMs off people passing through, it can be tedious answering the same questions, 'how are you'? 'where are you from'? 'How old'? and the other inappropriate Q's, but it's easy to just ignore them if you wish, nobody can force you to respond.

Then there is a downside to hanging out at a Welcome Area (although technically Help Island is no longer a WA). They can be drama zones, and a magnet for griefers, so I tend to either tune out or tp out when that happens.

I am sure you will find your own place in SL, somewhere you feel you can be whoever you want to be, or you can be like me and countless others and just float around the grid and enjoy SL for it's amazing Creator Content.

Just remember, nobody can force you to talk about anything you don't want to talk about, and they can either accept you for the person they see before them, or not. Don't stress about it either way.

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If you're seeking out an RP cantina of sorts, what is preventing you from picking out an RP sim that features a bar / club / dance area? Many modern and dystopian RP Sims include some aspect of city life, and it isn't too wildly left field to answe the where are you from questions with a complete and total fabrication--or, if you feel skittish of naming an existing place, answe with, "oh, a place within an hour's drive..."

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