Locking my doors frm now on...

[SweetLadyMell]

hi all ^^

It's me again, Mell that needs to learn a lot :).

Yesterday I had something weird, and maybe a simple solution applies, but it's stil creepy. I got IMed while I was alone with a friend INSIDE my own home. I had to (somewhat directly) fend of this creep, that wanted me to "stomp" him. Whatever that means. At one point, I found myself in some sort of dungeon, I had to turn off the RLV, relog and TP out of therere, after I relogged turning on the RLV, I was back in that dungeon. After answering "NO" to the question to animate my avatar, I could TP out of there...even with RLV on...

This is creepy...can someone "see" me even when I'm in my own home?

Thanks for helping out a scared girl, that locks her doors before going to bed from now on :)

Mell

xxx

 

[SweetLadyMell]

hi all ^^

It's me again, Mell that needs to learn a lot :).

Yesterday I had something weird, and maybe a simple solution applies, but it's stil creepy. I got IMed while I was alone with a friend INSIDE my own home. I had to (somewhat directly) fend of this creep, that wanted me to "stomp" him. Whatever that means. At one point, I found myself in some sort of dungeon, I had to turn off the RLV, relog and TP out of therere, after I relogged turning on the RLV, I was back in that dungeon. After answering "NO" to the question to animate my avatar, I could TP out of there...even with RLV on...

This is creepy...can someone "see" me even when I'm in my own home?

Thanks for helping out a scared girl, that locks her doors before going to bed from now on :)

Mell

xxx

 

[Madelaine McMasters]

Hi Mell,

There is no real privacy in SL, unless you own a private sim. Anybody can cam into your home at any time. With some effort, they can enter it as well, even with the doors locked. Fortunately, that ability to see you stops at the screen of your computer. Only your avatar has no privacy, your RL self is only as exposed as you allow. So, guard your RL identity!

There is a simple solution to lack of SL privacy, which is not to say it's an easy solution. You will have to find a way for this not to bother you. Most of the people in SL who grief others are looking for some kind of response. They feed on it. If you deny them that sustenance, they'll go elsewhere. You always have the ability to TP elsewhere, log out, or file an Abuse Report, but all of those require more effort and (for me at least) create more bother than simply ignoring whoever's trying to bug me.

I don't know the circumstances of your home rental, but if you have enough estate rights, you might install a security orb. I've never owned one (never felt the need), so I don't know how they work, but they have the potential to be a nuisance for well behaved residents and they seem like they'd be a constant reminder that I haven't figured out how avoid unwanted attention.

As you've already learned, you must be careful about accepting objects or permission requests. This will prevent people from taking unwanted control of your avatar, or burdening you with malicious things that require effort to eradicate.

Beyond these precautions, the best defense is to take no offense. Most SL residents are not troublemakers and living as if they were will ultimately take a lot of the fun out of SL. So, thicken up that skin, but not so much that nobody wants to give it a hug now and then.

Good luck,
Maddy

 

 

 

 

[Amethyst Jetaime]

If you own the land or rent and have some owner rights you can go set your land up so no one outside your property can see or see chat on your property. 

The owner of a parcel (or, for group-owned land, a group member with the necessary rights) can hide avatars and their chat from those outside the parcel. By default, parcels DO NOT have hidden avatars.

When enabled:

• Those outside the parcel can't see avatars on the parcel and vice-versa.  Other objects are not affected (EXCEPTION: vehicles ridden by hidden avatars are also hidden.)
• Those outside the parcel can't see nearby text chat from those on the parcel, and vice-versa.

Group text chat is not affected.

To be clear, when a parcel has avatars hidden, anyone outside the parcel cannot see (or communicate with) those on the parcel; conversely, if you are on the parcel, you can't see (or communicate with) anyone outside of it. The communication restrictions apply only to nearby (regular) chat, not group chat.

The world map and mini-map are unaffected. LSL sensors function normally, and detect the presence of avatars on parcels with this setting enabled.

They will still see your green dot on radar and on the map but not your actual avatar.

To hide avatars on a parcel:

1. Choose World > Place Profile > About Land or right-click on the parcel and choose About Land.
2. Click the OPTIONS tab.
3. Clear the Allow other Residents to / See and chat with residents on this parcel checkbox. By default, this checkbox is selected.

 

 

 

If you rent your home and don't have access to this you can get  your landlord to do this.  You may also want to restrict sound and voice to your parcel.

You can also set your parcel access to allow only your groups members or friends you put on an access list.  If you live on a private estate check your convenant to see if ban lines are prohibited first though.  If they are, chances are you can use a security orb as Maddy suggested.

If you know who this person was that kidnapped you, and you live on a private estate, I'd ask the estate owner to ban him from the sim.  I'd also AR him for kidnapping you against your will.

You should also set your RLV so only those you wish to have access to you have it to prevent strangers from taking you over without your consent.

 

[Marianne Little]

To use RLV, labels you as a "plaything". I am sorry, but that is how it is. Using a security orb will not stop others from force teleporting you. 

The RLV device used to "summon" you was probably of the milder kind, allowing you to teleport back when you rejected the animation, or maybe it allows you to teleport back on the third try. I never bothered with RLV myself, it is not my kind of thing. I want to be left alone when I want to be left alone, and if I go to adult places, I can sit on stuff myself. It sounds like it's not your thing either, or at least something you should turn off when you aren't in the mood to be toyed with.

Have you joined some groups in an adult place you visit? http://community.secondlife.com/t5/Your-Avatar/I-m-NOT-a-wabbit-I-m-not/td-p/2175873

If so, anyone who joins the group can look at the member list and see who is logged in. I bet that is what happened, someone was looking for a sub to play with and picked a female that showed online. One of the reasons I don't join groups such places. Most guys who consider themself "dom" is hapless.

Edited to add: I didn't know that RLV let you choose who you want to play with. Good to know, that makes it more tolerable. But I know... different people, different kinks. 

Edited to add: I might think you are trolling... how can an adult female with a good vocabulary not grasp what "stomp" means in this context? Methinks you sound a bit too innocent and afraid for one who visit adult places and turn on RLV.

[Summer Tison]

In all fairness I had never heard the word 'Stomp' in that context either...maybe I'm too old

Mell is a lovely person and in no way do I think she's a troll, unless I'm now considered a troll or uneducated because I didn't understand the word either

 

[SweetLadyMell]

@ Maddy - Beyond these precautions, the best defense is to take no offense

Wise words I'll take to heart...maybe I'm just seeing too much into this...

@ Amitist - thanks, these tips will be tested ^^

@ Marianne Little - Edited to add: I might think you are trolling... how can an adult female with a good vocabulary not grasp what "stomp" means in this context? Methinks you sound a bit too innocent and afraid for one who visit adult places and turn on RLV.

Allow me to place everything into context, I just discovered my BDSM, and to be frank, it scared me. A lot. Now, I'd like to get to grasp with this new thing in my life in a safe way, making friends that would like to guide me through this...

Sorry if it seemed like trolling...but here I am: confronted with this BDSM and SL at the same time.

@ Summer Tison - yep, me as a 45 year old dont know that either

All in all, let's be honest all, to get an invite to "stomp" (whatever that may mean) without a least bit of prior "intro" seems somewhat too "flat"...I think all of us (ladies) should agree: will you stomp me? - could do with a bit more ... padding... ^^

As I mention in my profile: patience, please. Thanks beforehand....

However, I've been thinking, and the whole thing may be simple. He read my posts, noted my name, did a people search in-world and dug up my profile...IM was the next step ^^

Men, sooooo resourcefull...when motivated...

Mell

xxx

 

 

 

[Madelaine McMasters]

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Summer Tison wrote:

In all fairness I had never heard the word 'Stomp' in that context either...maybe I'm too old

Mell is a lovely person and in no way do I think she's a troll, unless I'm now considered a troll or uneducated because I didn't understand the word either

 

---

Agreed. I wasn't sure what "stomp" meant either, and from what I've seen of Mell, she's a peach.

[SweetLadyMell]

...thanks...this "peach" it finding her way in a new world...making frineds...and (sorry folks) sometimes bumping into stuff... ^^

[Lisette Seranno]

The best thing to do is get a skybox or land that has privacy and security. There's all kinds of weirdos on sl, I've had people Rez into my house, but security bans them after 10 seconds.

 

Also you might want to turn your rlv off. I read somewhere viewers like singularity come with it enabled. I don't messed with things like that because people can do some pretty messed up things to you with it enabled.

[Kelli May]

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Marianne Little wrote:

...

Edited to add: I might think you are trolling... how can an adult female with a good vocabulary not grasp what "stomp" means in this context? Methinks you sound a bit too innocent and afraid for one who visit adult places and turn on RLV.

---

Adult female with a good vocabulary here, and seven years in SL with lots of BDSM experience. I've never heard 'stomp' used in a sexual context in or out of SL. 'Trampling' yes, but stomping?

[Perrie Juran]

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Kelli May wrote:

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Marianne Little wrote:

...

Edited to add: I might think you are trolling... how can an adult female with a good vocabulary not grasp what "stomp" means in this context? Methinks you sound a bit too innocent and afraid for one who visit adult places and turn on RLV.

---

Adult female with a good vocabulary here, and seven years in SL with lots of BDSM experience. I've never heard 'stomp' used in a sexual context in or out of SL. 'Trampling' yes, but stomping?

---

please tell me that neither of these words have nothing to do with testicles

pretty please

[Madeline Blackbart]

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Lisette Seranno wrote:

The best thing to do is get a skybox or land that has privacy and security. There's all kinds of weirdos on sl, I've had people Rez into my house, but security bans them after 10 seconds.

 

Also you might want to turn your rlv off. I read somewhere viewers like singularity come with it enabled. I don't messed with things like that because people can do some pretty messed up things to you with it enabled.

---

I keep RLV on constantly and have it on auto accept. While I do almost expect something like this to happen to me...and frankly if it did I might play along for fun....yet it has not. This would probably be because I tend not to frequent places or join groups that people like that hang out at. So where you hang out helps a lot.

@ OP have you considered joining groups that teach that sort of stuff. Like how to use RLV and so on? Theres teh adult hub has info. There's plenty of places with interesting books. I myself am not into bdsm outside of second life but I find it interesting and the libraries in SL informative. I think also the community does seem willing to talk to new members so finding a group for that may be helpful.

[Malanya]

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Marianne Little wrote:

To use RLV, labels you as a "plaything". I am sorry, but that is how it is. Using a security orb will not stop others from force teleporting you. 

The RLV device used to "summon" you was probably of the milder kind, allowing you to teleport back when you rejected the animation, or maybe it allows you to teleport back on the third try. I never bothered with RLV myself, it is not my kind of thing. I want to be left alone when I want to be left alone, and if I go to adult places, I can sit on stuff myself. It sounds like it's not your thing either, or at least something you should turn off when you aren't in the mood to be toyed with.

Have you joined some groups in an adult place you visit?

http://community.secondlife.com/t5/Your-Avatar/I-m-NOT-a-wabbit-I-m-not/td-p/2175873

If so, anyone who joins the group can look at the member list and see who is logged in. I bet that is what happened, someone was looking for a sub to play with and picked a female that showed online. One of the reasons I don't join groups such places. Most guys who consider themself "dom" is hapless.

Edited to add: I didn't know that RLV let you choose who you want to play with. Good to know, that makes it more tolerable. But I know... different people, different kinks. 

Edited to add: I might think you are trolling... how can an adult female with a good vocabulary not grasp what "stomp" means in this context? Methinks you sound a bit too innocent and afraid for one who visit adult places and turn on RLV.

---

RLV does not make anyone a "Plaything" (I am sorry, that may be how it is to YOU)  Because it is also used for other things is SL besides what you described. Do you happen to know what they are? They have nothing to do with D/s or kidnapping or controlloing ANOTHER avatar. Look it up, because I find it hard to believe that you would not know that right?

You think she might be trolling, well others may have ideas and thoughts about what you may be doing by your post.

 

[Malanya]

Sometimes you just run into "advice givers" that ... Well I can't say Last time I responded to someone after they said pretty rude things to me and called me a liar, It seems they RIC'd my post. So.. I am sure you get the point. I would not think that the word "stomp"  (the word can mean anything.. it's sl and people do make use of words as they feel)  can define anything about you. Enjoy.

 

[Syo Emerald]

I wouldn't say its wrong to say that it makes you "a plaything". It doesn't make you that for the good people, the ones who don't fear to use their brain and/or have some manners. But to the rest....well that just fits to describe them. Griefers will see this as an invitation (even more since many inexperianced users first action seems to be to turn on RLV and/or click random things). And dumb wannabe masters will think its an invitation to mess and play around with that person how they like.

[Sephina Frostbite]

When I was in my linden home I get perved quite frequently. I got a nice home, sky home thats fairly private but I know its not 100% percent protected. As others have said. There is no garentee in sl. Wish you the best mama.

[Malanya]

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Syo Emerald wrote:

I wouldn't say its wrong to say that it makes you "a plaything". It doesn't make you that for the good people, the ones who don't fear to use their brain and/or have some manners. But to the rest....well that just fits to describe them. Griefers will see this as an invitation (even more since many inexperianced users first action seems to be to turn on RLV and/or click random things). And dumb wannabe masters will think its an invitation to mess and play around with that person how they like.

---

To say it makes you look like a "plaything" is wrong. I use RLV for my inventory system and one of my closet systems. I have a texture board that uses RLV to share amongst the group also, does that make me a plaything? Absolutely not. You're right there are many dom wannabes and naive people, but that generalization of a "plaything" to anyone who uses RLV and to call the OP a troll was very *off*.

 edit sp

[Perrie Juran]

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Malanya wrote:

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Syo Emerald wrote:

I wouldn't say its wrong to say that it makes you "a plaything". It doesn't make you that for the good people, the ones who don't fear to use their brain and/or have some manners. But to the rest....well that just fits to describe them. Griefers will see this as an invitation (even more since many inexperianced users first action seems to be to turn on RLV and/or click random things). And dumb wannabe masters will think its an invitation to mess and play around with that person how they like.

---

To say it makes you look like a "plaything" is wrong. I use RLV for my inventory system and one of my closet systems. I have a texture board that uses RLV to share amongst the group also, does that make me a plaything? Absolutely not. You're right there are many dom wannabes and naive people, but that generalization of a "plaything" to anyone who uses RLV and to call the OP a troll was very *off*.

 edit sp

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I get a laugh sometimes out of the fact that many Doms have almost no knowledge of all the things you can do with RLV, some of which may or may not be BDSM oriented.  But it makes me laugh that they know nothing about what they are using.

[Malanya]

Yes, that's true. Many people don't know what they are doing with RLV period. Glad i am not in search of a dom.. 

 

[Studio09]

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Madeline Blackbart wrote:

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@ OP have you considered joining groups that teach that sort of stuff. Like how to use RLV and so on? Theres teh adult hub has info.

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I turned RLV on for a top I bought and I can't get it to work right even though I set up the inventory folders as indicated.  Is there info somewhere explaining how this all works?  This should be simple so don't think I need to join a group or take a class.

 

 

[Sassy Romano]

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Studio09 wrote:

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Madeline Blackbart wrote:

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@ OP have you considered joining groups that teach that sort of stuff. Like how to use RLV and so on? Theres teh adult hub has info.

---

I turned RLV on for a top I bought and I can't get it to work right even though I set up the inventory folders as indicated.  Is there info somewhere explaining how this all works?  This should be simple so don't think I need to join a group or take a class.

 

 

---

Either:-

1. You don't have RLV enabled
2. You haven't created the folders within #RLV *exactly* as required
3. Your viewer has the wrong version of RLV for the requirements of the product
4. Product doesn't work as intended

You're right that it should be simple, my guess is (2) above

[Studio09]

Thanks.  When I first set this top up I was on my laptop.  Now that I'm home again I forgot to turn RLV on my viewer on my IMac.  So toggled that on and restarted but still get the same error when I wear the necktie/collar from the item in the #RLV folder:
.:GiMa:. back to school knot shirt RLV device + collar (chest)[script:Interaction] Script run-time error
Stack-Heap Collision

I'll remove and rebuild the #RLV folders for this top and see if it works then.

Thanks for your help.

 

[Sassy Romano]

stack-heap collision means the script is out of memory.  I'd suggest that has nothing to do with folder structure unless the folders are very long in length and even then, for it to be that critical would suggest that the script needs attention from the creator rather than customer.

[Studio09]

Thanks