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The Blackwidow


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Hello to all the people on the SL forum, I would like to share my story and would like to hear you opinion on that.

 

So I am using a female Avatar in SL, but I am male in RL. I have experienced that nearly every male in Sl that I have met (in the adult areas of SL) are totally unfriendly to woman (or rather female avatars). They only want sex and want you to describe yourself, send pics etc.

Thus I decided to get a new hobby: I am looking for man and try to get into a relationship with them (which doesn't really need long, for many of them it starts after talking for 30 mins). These relationships are nearly always bdsm relationships, I am "playing" sub or slave and they are the doms.

And of course they wish to have sex and other things, but they are not getting that. I am just playing with them, sometimes I get small presents or some money in order buy a better looking avatar, so I can please them more (there words!).   I just take there little presents, break there heart and the leave and never talk to them again.

 

And I think that they do deserve that for being so unfriendly and mean and always just looking for sex. I yet have to meet one man online in SL who is nice.

 

So what do you think about this? Am I doing right or wrong? Is it justified, do they deserve it?

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Seriously? If those are the only type of men you meet, then you are going to the wrong places. I have never met anyone like that. Perhaps someone really new who hasn't learned how to handle himself yet in SL. Personally, I feel that your response to that behavior only serves to promote a sad, misogynistic stereotype of women. It just makes me sad.

 

It's just my opinion, but then, you asked.

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Don't go to the cheap places. Adult sims which advertise themselves with free sex or use degrading words in their description usually attract the wrong kind of guys. They are not looking for a relationship, they are here for cybersex.

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Griffin Ceawlin wrote:


Faliha wrote:

So what do you think about this?

I think that they're pigs, and that you're not much better.

I agree with this. Two wrongs don't make a right as they say. I've met men like this i've also met men who are very nice. It's a matter of going to the right places. Adult sims and nude beaches always have men like that. Clubs and things have a better selection if you will.

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Your behavior taking their gifts and such when you have no intention of doing anything other than "breaking their hearts", gives all women an bad name, and as a RL woman I for one think what you are doing is worse than the men you complain about. 

You don't deserve to meet a nice man because in the end, unless you are honest up front about being a man in RL, when he finds out it's going to be worse than getting his heart broken. 

 

 

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Faliha wrote:

Hello to all the people on the SL forum, I would like to share my story and would like to hear you opinion on that.

 

So I am using a female Avatar in SL, but I am male in RL. I have experienced that nearly every male in Sl that I have met (in the adult areas of SL) are totally unfriendly to woman (or rather female avatars). They only want sex and want you to describe yourself, send pics etc.

Thus I decided to get a new hobby: I am looking for man and try to get into a relationship with them (which doesn't really need long, for many of them it starts after talking for 30 mins). These relationships are nearly always bdsm relationships, I am "playing" sub or slave and they are the doms.

And of course they wish to have sex and other things, but they are not getting that. I am just playing with them, sometimes I get small presents or some money in order buy a better looking avatar, so I can please them more (there words!).   I just take there little presents, break there heart and the leave and never talk to them again.

 

And I think that they do deserve that for being so unfriendly and mean and always just looking for sex. I yet have to meet one man online in SL who is nice.

 

So what do you think about this? Am I doing right or wrong? Is it justified, do they deserve it?

I do get hit on but most the time the men are very nice. The ones who just expect nookie are nice as well. I tell them that I only do that with people I know well. They usually say thank you and walk away. You must be going to horrid places.

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Faliha wrote:

And I think that they do deserve that for being so unfriendly and mean and always just looking for sex. I yet have to meet one man online in SL who is nice.

So what do you think about this? Am I doing right or wrong? Is it justified, do they deserve it?

I meet nice men online all the time!  In second life I've met some of the most amazing men! Smart, interesting and very nice men.   Are we on two different Internets or in two different Second Life's? 

 

Ever hear about Socrates and the Happy Traveler on the Road to Athens?

Traveler One:

Socrates had risen early and was strolling on one of the country roads on the outskirts of the great city. A happy traveler came strolling down the road towards him.

The happy traveler hailed the old philosopher and greeted him warmly. The sage returned the greeting.

The happy traveler asked the Greek master: “What are the people of Athens like?” the philosopher looked the fellow up and down and asked: “Where are you from?” The traveler replied:” I hail from Pyrus. I have lived there my entire life. I have heard many tales of Athens, and finally decided it was time to travel there and see it for myself.” Socrates then asked the fellow: “Well what are the people of Pyrus like?”

The happy traveler said: “Oh the people of Pyrus are warm, friendly, caring and generally well mannered. They welcome strangers with open arms. It is a good town because the people who live there are good people.”

The sage smiled: “My friend you will find that the people of Athens are very similar to those of Pyrus.” Happy the traveler then took his leave of Socrates and set off for Athens.

 

Traveler Two:

Socrates was about to sit down to eat the first half of his lunch when he was again interrupted by a second traveler.

Their interaction was similar to that of the first. The fellow asked the old philosopher what the people of Athens were like. Again the philosopher asked the second traveler where he was from. Low and behold the second traveler was also from Pyrus.

But when Socrates asked the fellow what the people of Pyrus were like, the second traveler responded: “Oh, they are mean. They are greedy and selfish. No one in Pyrus has any time for strangers. They spite and snub their neighbours. It is a terrible place, full of low-life and nastiness. I couldn’t wait to get out of there. I have lived there my entire life.”

Socrates sighed: “I am sorry to tell you this young fellow. But, the people of Athens are exactly the same as those of Pyrus.”

 

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As others have said… I don’t know where you do hang out. But I rarely meet the kind of men you describe in your post. Anyhow…do you really waste your leisure time in SL playing those kind of nasty, childlike games?...I just wonder what’s wrong with some people. Does lag affect their brains in RL or what?

As a final note; don’t be mistaken here. You are not breaking any hearts; you are only bruising the ego and pride of that kind of men you are describing. As soon as you left, they keep on the chase, for the next girl who will agree to have fun with them

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Faliha wrote:

 

So what do you think about this? Am I doing right or wrong? Is it justified, do they deserve it?

If it tickles your pickle, have at it. Just know, karma's a biotch and one day you'll be standing there scratching your head trying to figure out why she's just slapped you upside the head with the biggest stick you've ever seen. You can then think fondly on all the things you've done in life that probably earned you the whack.

I'm sure some might welcome that stick. Me? I avoid doing things that might bring that stick upon me. Little, or big, it's really not worth it just to stick it to someone else, to me. Easier to just walk away, shake my head at them if I must, and be glad I'm not that kind of person.

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The OP is a perfect example of why so many men get pushy demanding voice and/or RL pictures.

Of course that doesn't really help because there are just as many (if not more) rl woman as rl men in SL who get off on pretending affection and even love to hurt others as deeply as they possibly can.

Thats some serously sick chit and unfotunitly, all to common.

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I just take there little presents, break there heart and the leave and never talk to them again. And I think that they do deserve that for being so unfriendly and mean and always just looking for sex.

I see. So you fancy yourself as some kind of 'gender vigilante'. Do we applaud now, or better wait until you take down the 'big boss'?

 

I yet have to meet one man online in SL who is nice.

This always reminds me of that psichological trick where someone asks you to go near a road and start counting how many red cars pass in the next fifteen minutes; after that, you go back to that someone and he asks you: 'now, how many blue cars passed?'; you resent it and complain that you were focusing on the red ones, as directed, and didn't care to notice the blue ones, much less count them.

The difference here, is that no one asked you to go doing the rounds to find and punish the kind of selfish men that offer women gifts in exchange for their feminine favours. Anyway, it's small wonder you haven't found any.

 

So what do you think about this? Am I doing right or wrong? Is it justified, do they deserve it?

Do you seriously care what we think of it? To be perfectly honest, I'm rather inclined to see this as just the umpteenth thematic troll seeking to 'raise the hilariously angry answers of the righteous' with an all too obvious account of wrong deeds.

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Celestiall Nightfire wrote:


Faliha wrote:

And I think that they do deserve that for being so unfriendly and mean and always just looking for sex. I yet have to meet one man online in SL who is nice.

So what do you think about this? Am I doing right or wrong? Is it justified, do they deserve it?

I meet nice men online all the time!  In second life I've met some of the most amazing men! Smart, interesting and very nice men.   Are we on two different Internets or in two different Second Life's? 

 

Ever hear about Socrates and the Happy Traveler on the Road to Athens?

Traveler One:

Socrates had risen early and was strolling on one of the country roads on the outskirts of the great city. A happy traveler came strolling down the road towards him.

The happy traveler hailed the old philosopher and greeted him warmly. The sage returned the greeting.

The happy traveler asked the Greek master: “What are the people of Athens like?” the philosopher looked the fellow up and down and asked: “Where are you from?” The traveler replied:” I hail from Pyrus. I have lived there my entire life. I have heard many tales of Athens, and finally decided it was time to travel there and see it for myself.” Socrates then asked the fellow: “Well what are the people of Pyrus like?”

The happy traveler said: “Oh the people of Pyrus are warm, friendly, caring and generally well mannered. They welcome strangers with open arms. It is a good town because the people who live there are good people.”

The sage smiled: “My friend you will find that the people of Athens are very similar to those of Pyrus.” Happy the traveler then took his leave of Socrates and set off for Athens.

 

Traveler Two:

Socrates was about to sit down to eat the first half of his lunch when he was again interrupted by a second traveler.

Their interaction was similar to that of the first. The fellow asked the old philosopher what the people of Athens were like. Again the philosopher asked the second traveler where he was from. Low and behold the second traveler was also from Pyrus.

But when Socrates asked the fellow what the people of Pyrus were like, the second traveler responded: “Oh, they are mean. They are greedy and selfish. No one in Pyrus has any time for strangers. They spite and snub their neighbours. It is a terrible place, full of low-life and nastiness. I couldn’t wait to get out of there. I have lived there my entire life.”

Socrates sighed: “I am sorry to tell you this young fellow. But, the people of Athens are exactly the same as those of Pyrus.”

 

Love it! Thanks for sharing. Very wise man indeed. 

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there are lots of players on the internet, and nice people too who just want to chat.

 

I agree with the person that says you don't need to play vigilante to pigs like that.  There is only one life time and I think you could do something more constructive with your time such as learning gourmet cooking. 

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Sephina Frostbite wrote:


Celestiall Nightfire wrote:


Faliha wrote:

And I think that they do deserve that for being so unfriendly and mean and always just looking for sex. I yet have to meet one man online in SL who is nice.

So what do you think about this? Am I doing right or wrong? Is it justified, do they deserve it?

I meet nice men online all the time!  In second life I've met some of the most amazing men! Smart, interesting and very nice men.   Are we on two different Internets or in two different Second Life's? 

 

Ever hear about Socrates and the Happy Traveler on the Road to Athens?

Traveler One:

Socrates had risen early and was strolling on one of the country roads on the outskirts of the great city. A happy traveler came strolling down the road towards him.

The happy traveler hailed the old philosopher and greeted him warmly. The sage returned the greeting.

The happy traveler asked the Greek master: “What are the people of Athens like?” the philosopher looked the fellow up and down and asked: “Where are you from?” The traveler replied:” I hail from Pyrus. I have lived there my entire life. I have heard many tales of Athens, and finally decided it was time to travel there and see it for myself.” Socrates then asked the fellow: “Well what are the people of Pyrus like?”

The happy traveler said: “Oh the people of Pyrus are warm, friendly, caring and generally well mannered. They welcome strangers with open arms. It is a good town because the people who live there are good people.”

The sage smiled: “My friend you will find that the people of Athens are very similar to those of Pyrus.” Happy the traveler then took his leave of Socrates and set off for Athens.

 

Traveler Two:

Socrates was about to sit down to eat the first half of his lunch when he was again interrupted by a second traveler.

Their interaction was similar to that of the first. The fellow asked the old philosopher what the people of Athens were like. Again the philosopher asked the second traveler where he was from. Low and behold the second traveler was also from Pyrus.

But when Socrates asked the fellow what the people of Pyrus were like, the second traveler responded: “Oh, they are mean. They are greedy and selfish. No one in Pyrus has any time for strangers. They spite and snub their neighbours. It is a terrible place, full of low-life and nastiness. I couldn’t wait to get out of there. I have lived there my entire life.”

Socrates sighed: “I am sorry to tell you this young fellow. But, the people of Athens are exactly the same as those of Pyrus.”

 

Love it! Thanks for sharing. Very wise man indeed. 

My (recently moved away) neighbor and I are modern examples of the "Happy Traveler" story. She always complained about the people who worked at local stores. They were incompetent and lazy. I shopped at the same stores and found the staff to not only be generally competent and helpful, but also to know my name. Now and then we'd shop together and she would marvel at the service I got, particularly how I'd be greeted by name when I entered the store.

Curiously, she did not appear to notice that I'd often greet the staff by name as well. Having frequented the same hardware store for all of my 43 years (Dad tracked my baby growth by plopping me on the store's Hobart scale, because it read to the ounce) it would have been hard to avoid learning the name of the store's ever present proprietor. Yet my neighbor, who lived here for 62 years, managed it.

When you encounter people, if you reflect their behavior in your own and they're doing the same, you've about a 50/50 chance of racing to the bottom. If you simply project your best self, you've already guaranteed that the worst outcome ain't half bad.

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While I agree on it mostly, its not always that way. Sometimes people act mean towards someone without any fault from that person. For example bullying in school. The victims aren't causing the trouble by wrong behavior in the first place. And sometimes you just meet people with bad character traits.

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Madelaine McMasters wrote:



Love it! Thanks for sharing. Very wise man indeed. 

My (recently moved away) neighbor and I are modern examples of the "Happy Traveler" story. She always complained about the people who worked at local stores. They were incompetent and lazy. I shopped at the same stores and found the staff to not only be generally competent and helpful, but also to know my name. Now and then we'd shop together and she would marvel at the service I got, particularly how I'd be greeted by name when I entered the store.

Curiously, she did not appear to notice that I'd often greet the staff by name as well. Having frequented the same hardware store for all of my 43 years (Dad tracked my baby growth by plopping me on the store's Hobart scale, because it read to the ounce) it would have been hard to avoid learning the name of the store's ever present proprietor. Yet my neighbor, who lived here for 62 years, managed it.

When you encounter people, if you reflect their behavior in your own and they're doing the same, you've about a 50/50 chance of racing to the bottom. If you simply project your best self, you've already guaranteed that the worst outcome ain't half bad.

I work at mcdonalds and this is very true for me. I have people come in and treat me like complete and utter crap. Now I will give those people good service because it's my job but if you come in and treat me with respect I will go out of my way to give you the best service I possibly can.

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