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Sephina Frostbite wrote:


Abigail Merlin wrote:

First thing I usually look for in a profile is RP info, some background on their character, maybe family or history.

Things like RL pictures or bashing the moto rl=rl sl=sl usually makes me close the profile right away.

I don't it when people bash RL/RL SL/SL either. Its my choice. I am still a good person, down to earth sweet and fun to be around..Most days lol. I hate it when people who say hi can I see you picture? Um you just said hi so no. I personally like to get to know a person. Nothing to hide its just the way I was built, Im young but Im old fashioned when it comes to that I guess. Ive gotten attacked when I told a person, "You want to know me then put the time in and I will show you but just saying hi sexy avi doesn't cut it". Also have you noticed that if they have their RL photo they demand you to show yours? 

Yes, I noticed that too. I remember being in a club, dancing, chatting...the usual stuff. Suddenly a guy IM'd me and we talked a few moments, then out of nothing he started sending me unquestioned pictures of him and asked me to do the same. It was kind of awkward how I had to defend myself and my decision not to share pictures with a stranger I just met.

But did you ever got a google maps link to someones home? Thats what happend to my alt a few months ago.

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Syo Emerald wrote:


Sephina Frostbite wrote:


Abigail Merlin wrote:

First thing I usually look for in a profile is RP info, some background on their character, maybe family or history.

Things like RL pictures or bashing the moto rl=rl sl=sl usually makes me close the profile right away.

I don't it when people bash RL/RL SL/SL either. Its my choice. I am still a good person, down to earth sweet and fun to be around..Most days lol. I hate it when people who say hi can I see you picture? Um you just said hi so no. I personally like to get to know a person. Nothing to hide its just the way I was built, Im young but Im old fashioned when it comes to that I guess. Ive gotten attacked when I told a person, "You want to know me then put the time in and I will show you but just saying hi sexy avi doesn't cut it". Also have you noticed that if they have their RL photo they demand you to show yours? 

Yes, I noticed that too. I remember being in a club, dancing, chatting...the usual stuff. Suddenly a guy IM'd me and we talked a few moments, then out of nothing he started sending me unquestioned pictures of him and asked me to do the same. It was kind of awkward how I had to defend myself and my decision not to share pictures with a stranger I just met.

But did you ever got a google maps link to someones home? Thats what happend to my alt a few months ago.

To someones actual home.. wow. Ive gotten phone numbers randomly. The only thing id tell them is my age. Desperate people out there. Kind of scary. The one thing I hate about defending my choice to wait to show my photo is that it puts me as the "bad guy" even though I am not. I hate being told I am hiding something or that its not fair you see my photo. It instantly makes me feel bad. Even though no I am not hiding and really its there choice to show there photo right away. It also makes me feel like if I dont live up to there standards Im not worth talking to. People (in my experience) who demand a photo arent looking for friendships, more like sexualships. No thanks dont do that either right away.

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The one thing I hate about defending my choice to wait to show my photo is that it puts me as the "bad guy" even though I am not. I hate being told I am hiding something or that its not fair you see my photo. It instantly makes me feel bad. Even though no I am not hiding and really its there choice to show there photo right away. It also makes me feel like if I dont live up to there standards Im not worth talking to. People (in my experience) who demand a photo arent looking for friendships, more like sexualships. No thanks dont do that either right away.


Sephina, you should NEVER feel bad about refusing to reveal RL information.  People who don't respect your boundaries aren't worth getting to know, full stop.  THEY are the ones who ought to feel bad.  At the very least they need to learn a bit of online etiquette..

Plus, SL isn't Dateline.  Some people treat it as such and that's up to them, but SL is all kinds of things to all kinds of different people (as i'm sure you know).  I do hope you'll meet some of those "all kinds of different" people in the future.  :matte-motes-grin:

 

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Raimi Syaka wrote:

Wow, that is weird that someone would take offense at personal reasons for not wanting to dance with married men. Was it like taking a toy away or something?  I hear you on the muting part: some people just need to be muted. 

After I realized that this guy wasn't willing to listen to my reasons but just wanted to rant, I found it amusing to listen for a bit until I muted him.  Yep, muting is a girl's best friend. ;) 

I'm not sure if this has gone the way of bling and clicky shoes but in 2007-2009 when my former partner and I went dancing a lot, there were always people present that felt compelled to bless everyone with the WOOT! gesture, complete with huge, screen-scrolling graphics.  Keep in mind this was not in the "Corner Rowdy Bar," this would be in places like the Avilion Ballroom and other venues that require formal attire. Before there was a selection on SL viewers to mute sound gestures,  my partner and I would mute the "gesturebaters" individually.  On a few occasions the two of us would be the only ones left not muted to each other. :matte-motes-smile:  We used to say we needed matching T-shirts that said, "Mute the World."  A regular on the old forums, FD Spark (any oldbies remember him?) saw me post that once and created a "Mute the World" outfit for me.  It is one of my SL treasures.

 

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squashy Beeswing wrote:



The one thing I hate about defending my choice to wait to show my photo is that it puts me as the "bad guy" even though I am not. I hate being told I am hiding something or that its not fair you see my photo. It instantly makes me feel bad. Even though no I am not hiding and really its there choice to show there photo right away. It also makes me feel like if I dont live up to there standards Im not worth talking to. People (in my experience) who demand a photo arent looking for friendships, more like sexualships. No thanks dont do that either right away.


Sephina, you should NEVER feel bad about refusing to reveal RL information.  People who don't respect your boundaries aren't worth getting to know, full stop. 
THEY are the ones who ought to feel bad.
  At the very least they need to learn a bit of online etiquette..


....and muted. ;)

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Czari Zenovka wrote:

A regular on the old forums, FD Spark (any oldbies remember him?) saw me post that once and created a "Mute the World" outfit for me.  It is one of my SL treasures.

 

Yes, I remember him :)

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Phil Deakins wrote:


Czari Zenovka wrote:

A regular on the old forums, FD Spark (any oldbies remember him?) saw me post that once and created a "Mute the World" outfit for me.  It is one of my SL treasures.

 

Yes, I remember him
:)

/makes note to look up his profile next time I'm in world

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Good thinking. Mine's only there as a subtle joke almost meant for myself rather than anyone else; but with increased awareness about it, I understand your including it in your profile as an efficient way to get people to understand you better without needing too much in the way of explanations.

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Sephina Frostbite wrote:

The one thing I hate about defending my choice to wait to show my photo is that it puts me as the "bad guy" even though I am not. I hate being told I am hiding something or that its not fair you see my photo. It instantly makes me feel bad. Even though no I am not hiding and really its there choice to show there photo right away. It also makes me feel like if I dont live up to there standards Im not worth talking to. People (in my experience) who demand a photo arent looking for friendships, more like sexualships. No thanks dont do that either right away.


I don't think people should ever show their photo online. But I'm old fashioned that way. If you don't know who the person is, think about it - that is a lot of risk. Even if they send you a photo, how do you know it's them? (Catfish.) 

As far as emotional manipulation that is your cue to run. "I showed you mine, you show me yours." They can't set the rules without your input or permission then demand you abide by them. Just mute and teleport away.

My .02 and change.

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Phil Deakins wrote:

I took the cat in because it needed a home. I didn't actually want a cat but she's here, she sleeps on my bed, watches TV with me and wants a lot of stroking lol.

You discovered one of the secrets of cats - you don't find them; they find you. *Smiles*

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Phil Deakins wrote:

I took the cat in because it needed a home. I didn't actually want a cat but she's here, she sleeps on my bed, watches TV with me and wants a lot of stroking lol.

That's lovely.  Lucky cat, happy you. :cathappy:  :matte-motes-smile:

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Lucky cat, yes, but I'd rather she didn't sleep on my bed. It's a single bed and she takes up quite bit of the bottom end where my feet want to roam. She has a whole bedroom of her own with plenty of comfy stuff in it where she spends a fair chunk of each day. I won't shut her out of my bedroom though. And I'd prefer she didn't sleep on me when I'm watching TV because it gets quite hot under her. Also, when I'm concentrating on doing things on the computer, I'd rather she didn't sit on the table next to me and stare and meow at me, looking for strokes and petting - which she always gets. Apart from that, she's fine lol.

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