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mustangstud

How many of you have a "real" SL relationship?

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I do. It's working just fine in part precisely because we both consider it 'real' (and, to be fair, because we're quite well matched in many other things, including our expectations on how a relationship should be, regardless of the medium through which it's developed and lived). RL meeting is for now out of the question due to external causes.

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I had, for over a year, until my very close friend died rl of a heart attack. I was hurt as much or more than I would have been had an RL family member died, I'm less close to most of them than I was to her.

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mustangstud wrote:

And how is it working out for you?

Do u ever plan to meet or is it simply and "online" thing?

Hubby and I didn't meet in sl, we met in an online game ages ago. We were friends long before either had the cajones to own up to our feelings beyond just friends. We also migrated over to sl with a bunch of friends. Things just fell into place for us at all the right times, in all the right ways. We've been together in rl and sl since 2008. Life is still absolutely amazing and only getting better day by day.

 

 

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They can work although I would say its not the norm. I was engaged to be married to someone on sl and on our wedding day he died. I had to attend his funeral instead. I will be forever shattered so I am not sure if I will ever find sl love but I am not looking for it. However I know it can happen.

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Tari Landar wrote:


mustangstud wrote:

And how is it working out for you?

Do u ever plan to meet or is it simply and "online" thing?

Hubby and I didn't meet in sl, we met in an online game ages ago. We were friends long before either had the cajones to own up to our feelings beyond just friends. We also migrated over to sl with a bunch of friends. Things just fell into place for us at all the right times, in all the right ways. We've been together in rl and sl since 2008. Life is still absolutely amazing and only getting better day by day.

 

 

Love reading these stories. Makes me happy :) I wish you many more years of amazing days.

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Sephina Frostbite wrote:

They can work although I would say its not the norm. I was engaged to be married to someone on sl and on our wedding day he died. I had to attend his funeral instead. I will be forever shattered so I am not sure if I will ever find sl love but I am not looking for it. However I know it can happen.

That is aweful. I'm so sorry :(

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Yes but Ive grown because of him. So I am sad but I am glad I met him. I am a much better person because of him. As for your othwr post.. I also am a sucker for romance stories. Love reading them.

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Jewel Laurasia wrote:



Love reading these stories. Makes me happy
:)
I wish you many more years of amazing days.

 

Hehe, ty. I could talk about it all day. I have too, it's on these forums in probably a few places. I get long winded, but it's definitely a very sappy happily-ever-after :D

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It depends how you define "real".  I have a relationship in SL that is very real to both of us, we've been together in-world for two years.  However, we are both married in RL (our spouses both know about our SL relationship and are okay with it), we live four thousand miles apart from each other and thus we will never be partnered in RL.

That doesn't make our SL relationship any less real - it's just different.

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Tari Landar wrote:


mustangstud wrote:

And how is it working out for you?

Do u ever plan to meet or is it simply and "online" thing?

Hubby and I didn't meet in sl, we met in an online game ages ago. We were friends long before either had the cajones to own up to our feelings beyond just friends. We also migrated over to sl with a bunch of friends. Things just fell into place for us at all the right times, in all the right ways. We've been together in rl and sl since 2008. Life is still absolutely amazing and only getting better day by day.

 

 

 

^^ This

 

I have been with my man for a year and we are incredibly close, SL is actually unimportant now though it is still close to my heart. SL is as real as you want it to be.

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mustangstud wrote:

And how is it working out for you?

Do u ever plan to meet or is it simply and "online" thing?

A better way to put it than my misguided 'fishing' topic that I posted in a huff lol. Thank you.

To answer. No, not presently but I have in the past. I found it quite fullfilling, truthfully. It's the only type of relationship I'm really open to right now. Sometimes that can be discouraging and frustrating as it does feel like I am being 'fished for' by those wanting to meet someone in this world and pull them out of it. Particularly when you tell someone that up front and after  few days, it's not enough for them and they start pushing for more.

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mustangstud wrote:

And how is it working out for you?

Do u ever plan to meet or is it simply and "online" thing?

I know most people have been discussing love relationships but what about friendships? My SL friendship (we're married in sl lol) I feel very close to him and we talk daily on skype. I would very much like to meet him IRL so I'd say for me at least it's not simply an online thing or i'm hopingit won't stay that way.

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Met my RL guy in SL on December 24, 2010 and never looked back. I won't say we were looking for a relationship, but we found something in each other that just clicked. We met two months later in person and 4 months after we met we were living together in RL and have been ever since. We are proof positive that it CAN work, although we're not oblivious to the fact that we are one of the rare "success" stories. 

I see so many people in SL looking, and truthfully, it's a baaaad place to go shopping lol  A lot more broken hearts than fairy tales and happy endings. When I do hear of one working it always amazes me and reminds me that this medium can be used for far more than just pixel slex or living out fantasies.

Now if I could ever get him to log in anymore I'd be happy lol I've built up a pretty good business of which he's not involved, but it doesn't impact the "us" in RL because he knows I'm just on to work and occasionally build and the tenants I have that have tried to make more of things have found out quite rapidly where my heart lies and has in whose hands it has lain since the night we met. :heart:

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I met my Mistress here in SL in March of 2008, but meeting in RL was really at the time very impossible, due to she was in the States and with me living in Romania.

But in 2011, I came to the States on a US Club Tour with my music work, in which finally got to meet and she went with me for two weeks out on my US Tour.  The greatest two weeks of my life, and after 5 years together in SL, our relationship is still super strong.

But I think we would still be together even if we never met in RL, and yes you can have a real relationship here and never meet in person.

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I met my husband on another game about 14 years ago or so. It was a worldwide game with people from every country. We were actually enemies on it! :D Quite a few years went by and we started to talk, become friends, etc. Despite meeting people from all over the globe, it turned out my husband literally lived off the same street I did, same city, same state. We lived 2 minutes down the road from each other and he even knew my sister because they went to school together :D So we decided to meet, fell in love, and have been married for 8 years now. I came to SL alone like 4 years ago and eventually he came with me. Now we're together in SL and living just as happily as we do in RL ^_^ I just wanted to say that despite not having met on SL, it is possible to meet people in virtual worlds and have it work. I do think its a bit easier from the world we came from, as relationships seemed to last a bit better there. SL can be very quick with them, so finding the right kind of person who is honest, faithful, devoted, and as true about their feelings as you are can be difficult. Though it is possible :)

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I can say I do and I don't regret a moment of it.

It's just something that happened. Made a friend here on SL in our favorite RP sim, got along well OOC and we found out we clicked very well. She confronted me about how she was feeling, which honestly at the time surprised me a little, but I had to admit I felt the same way.

At the time it was only a SL thing, don't get me wrong for the both of us it was real, but actually traveling and meeting each other was out of the question. It was a financial issue and both of us didn't have the funds to book a lenthy trip.

Eventually we managed to pool together our resources and get her out here to me for the first time for a weekend visit and I have to say it was a wonderful weekend. Everything that clicked with us hanging out in SL naturally worked very well in RL when we went around the city..

Eventually, when we worked out a budget, she packed up everything and moved here with me. Going on two years and still strong. I think some of the others posting above me might have pointed out, but I agree with the idea that things just happen and you don't neccesarily have to go looking for it. And it does work, if things are right. You can have a relationship that starts on SL.

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One thing you said was key, and others (as you point out) have mentioned it: you weren't 'looking'. It just happened because things like that do happen. Obviously that's true with almost all of us in terms of the friends we have here, the ones we spend the most time talking to. We like them, That's how we became friends. It isn't exactly a huge leap to see friendship go beyond that level, if circumstances can allow it.

When you stop and think about it, it's completely unsurprising that a romantic relationship, based on honesty and real communication but founded in SL, would be just as romantic moved to RL. Kind of proves the point a great many people (including me) are fond of making: we CAN be our avatars and our avatars can be us. Might look different and probably the avatar has the advantage in appearance, but we can still be one and the same. I'm not saying that is true of everyone nor even that it should be. It IS possible.

Thanks for your post. Nice to see something about this from a guy. Oh, and tell your cousin Trinity I said 'Hi'. :-)

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       i think very few people have real relation in SL. relation through sl cannot be very reliable . there may be the frauds who gives wroug details and information.so it is better that you do not trust them blindly

 

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I met my SL hubby and RL BF through a friend in SL, bit of a long winded one. I was with a guy from the states who knew my current partner (although i was never allowed to meet him!). My ex upped and left SL one day with no real reason and my now BF contacted me to see if i knew what happened to him.


We started chatting from there on, first in world and then on Skype, he was currently with another woman so we were just friends hanging out and chatting. When he finally broke up with his GF i told him how i felt, he felt the same but needed some time after the break up with his now ex. We continued just being friends and hanging out most days for the next few months.


Finally we both woke up and said ok it's time to be together lol, which was about time as most of our friends will still tell us! We partnered in December 2012 and we met in RL i for the first time in April 2013. He has been down to see me a number of times now and i will be going up to him soon. We made the transittion from SL to RL very easily as there wasn't any lies between us and we knew eachother very very well because we were friends first.


I was never looking for love on SL after being burned by my first partner on SL but, it fell into my lap when i was least expecting it! We are now planning for him to move into my place and, of course our future. SL to RL can happen but never go looking for it as you are very likely to be burned. My SL romance turned out the best it could have but of course that doesn't always happen. There is always hope though!

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I wasn't looking for love in SL but found it anyway. I met my current RL partner in SL, and we have been together in RL for over 4 years. It does happen, and some people can have very nice relationships inside and outside of SL.

It's an untruth to make generalizations about SL and say that everyone in it is bad or a liar or that SL is some kind of evil empire full of men-who-pretend-to-be-women etc. My experience is that people who've had unrealistic expectations of SL (and then their little fantasy bubble got busted by someone they trusted too much) say these things. Most residents, I've found, are actually halfway decent people. And you can mute/ban the jerks when you find them. Too bad you can't do that in RL!

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Siryn Rosse wrote:

I wasn't looking for love in SL but found it anyway. I met my current RL partner in SL, and we have been together in RL for over 4 years. It does happen, and some people can have very nice relationships inside and outside of SL.

It's an untruth to make generalizations about SL and say that everyone in it is bad or a liar or that SL is some kind of evil empire full of men-who-pretend-to-be-women etc. My experience is that people who've had unrealistic expectations of SL (and then their little fantasy bubble got busted by someone they trusted too much) say these things. Most residents, I've found,
are actually halfway decent people
. And you can mute/ban the jerks when you find them. Too bad you can't do that in RL!

Why, I even know one who is almost completely decent. Way-y-y over half-way. :smileyhappy:

Thanks for adding your story, too. I really enjoy seeing those and I know a lot of the rest of us do as well.

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nijushrestha wrote:

       i think very few people have real relation in SL. relation through sl cannot be very reliable . there may be the frauds who gives wroug details and information.so it is better that you do not trust them blindly

 

Yes they can be both reliable, and unreliable.

If you think people cannot be just as fake in rl, in person, you are sorely mistaken. I'm fairly certain there are millions upon millions on this planet that can easily prove otherwise.

The divorce rate wouldn't be nearly as high as it is if people were always as trustworthy as they once present themselves. You don't need to "meet" electronically for someone to be untrustworthy.

But, it's hardly ever newsworthy when relationships that began online end up working out offline as well. It's far more interesting for people to read the ones that don't make it. So you won't read nearly as many. There are far more relationships that don't start online, and end up not working out, than otherwise, though.

Just food for thought.

 

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Dillon wrote:

 

 I really enjoy seeing those and I know a lot of the rest of us do as well.

Hi Dillon.  "A lot of the rest of us?"  Do you have any Wiki tables to support this statement?  I, for one, am so completely indifferent.   

 

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