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Ended a toxic relationship/friendship.


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That´s a sad story and I hope you are ok after ending this relationship.

But fact is, you are right!Never let yourself force to change the ava you feel comfortable with!

If there is true love it should not be bound on the look of an ava.....

Good luck in future!!!:matte-motes-smile:

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As much as you have right to remain human, he has got right to spend his life with a permanent furry. Just as you don't want to change yourself for him, he doesn't need to change his desires in the name of accepting you as you are either. So he is not the toxic one here. He persues what he desires, and you are following your heart as well. It's good for both of you. 

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I agree with the poster. Yes he has a right to be in a furry only relationship. However he knew that she wasn't that type of person to begin with. He couldn't except her but he was asking for her acceptance. Two way street. Regardless they shouldn't be together because of too many opposites. OP You did the right thing by leaving. You two had more then just Avi issues that weren't meshing. Wish you both the best.

EDIT: Radom period because I was on a phone at the time.

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Syo Emerald wrote:

Why did you partner him anyways? You seem to have nothing in common. But if you like drama, then you got what you want.

Was thinking the same thing - the furry issue seems like just a part of it.

Edit: Clarification

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I do not agree that no one should ever change for anyone. Relationships are often based on compromises. If both people want to make it work - then compromise and coming to a solution where everyone gives a little is perfectly fine.

 

I never had a relationship where I did not have to compromise on certain things. My  question is -how was that person "not comfortable" about interacting with humans in real life? I do not see many  furries running around when I leave the house rl - what is that all about?

 

 

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You are as toxic for him as he is for you. As much as you seem to believe all the wrongs came from him, I don't believe that for a second. I'm pretty sure you do know you had an equal part in the fallout, you just don't want to admit it. Likely, because you're emotional. That tends to happen when we end relationships, from time to time.

It's best you two aren't together, you make each other miserable. Neither one of you can accept the other. Forget compromises, you two can't even get alone on a basic social level. You both axpect things from the other, but aren't willing to bend a little to meet those needs. It was a disater before it began.

I'm sure you'll both be better off now. Hopefully the two of you can pursue the things you're really interested in, that will make you happy.

 

As for the poster who asked how someone can not like interacting with humans. The furry thing is irrelevant. Of course there aren't many furries running around in rl. That doesn't mean every person on the planet has to be a social little bumblebee. There are plenty of people who truly are not comfortable around most, if not all, people they encounter. There could be any number of reasons why, including physical, emotional, psychological, etc.. That doesn't mean they won't ever interract with people, it simply means they have difficulty(to varying degrees) and would much rather not have to do so. I'm goin to guess you've never met someone like that. It can make for a very difficult life. I can see how sl would be appealing to that sort of person because you truly can control your involvement with others 100%. You can slowly work on your issues, work up to talking to someone, work up to sharing thoughts, feelings. You get the point I'm sure. Life can be very, very damaging for folks dealing with that sort of thing.

 

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Maybe your ex-partner did love you, and still does love you even if you aren't compatible with him as a partner. It sounds like he was willing to compromise with you but when he asked for a break from it you went off the deep end. Would it have really been so hard to let him have some time away from you for a while? Would you have dumped him if he decided to go on vacation to the Bahamas for two weeks? It sounds like you wanted all of the compromises to be on his side with none of your own.

I mean let's put it in perspective here. If you had a partner who had this authentic dog poop necklace he really loved and he wanted to wear it once in a while, you might say "sure, I'll still hug you" but let's now say he wanted to wear it all the time every day then you might say "Well, I just don't want to be around you all the time when you're wearing the dog poop necklace. I won't ask you not to wear your favorite necklace, but I need some space for a while away from it so I can breathe." To him is's a chunk of gold around his neck, but to you it's smelly and looks like crap.

It simply astounds me that you can go from being a partner to a mortal enemy over your partner asking for some personal space to recharge away from you. If you know a lot of furries then I'm certain you know others who are exactly the same way and I will guarantee you have several on your friends list. Just because you can't be partners doesn't mean you can't be friends so you might think about messaging him and burying the hatchet instead of being a brat and obsessing over how much you hate him.

[edits to fix spelling and such]

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ImaTest wrote:

 

As for the poster who asked how someone can not like interacting with humans. The furry thing is irrelevant. Of course there aren't many furries running around in rl. That doesn't mean every person on the planet has to be a social little bumblebee. There are plenty of people who truly are not comfortable around most, if not all, people they encounter. There could be any number of reasons why, including physical, emotional, psychological, etc.. That doesn't mean they won't ever interract with people, it simply means they have difficulty(to varying degrees) and would much rather not have to do so

 

If one of my sl friends of aquaintances told me they are so uncomfortable around humans - they do not want to interact with them in sl or in real life - I would tell them to step away from sl for a good long while and sort out their rl issues. There are NO furries running around in rl - it is a fantasy people induldge in - and as soon as they have issues makes a very clear distinction between fantasy and reality - there is a problem. I tell the same things to people who play in Gor by the way - who think they are "gorean."

The furry thing in this case is very relevant - have you not read the OP?

 

 

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You did the right the thing.. No one shouldn't tell you who to be in SL..  I know a couple of Furs i hang out with Switch to Human time to time  its thier choice Just like being human in sl is your chioce and your choice alone

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