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Kelli May

'Bait-and-switch' submissives

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This is a combination of rant, question and discussion topic, so take it as you like.

Something I enjoy in SL is hypnotic D/s, with me very much on the submissive side. I don't always trance well, so sometimes I'm roleplaying the hypnosis (my submission is genuine, however). If the hypnotist wants a genuine subject, not a roleplayer, then I don't push myself on them.

Recently I was hypnotised by a Domme, and encouraged to let her take ownership of me. Almost immediately the focus of the hypnosis changed. She mentioned her husband (a resident I didn't know, but had seen at hypno D/s sims). She suggested I introduce myself, seduce him, and help her dominate him.

Alarm bells immediately rang for me. I've had a similar approach used before... a Domme seduces me, then tries to get me to dominate a male resident. On that occasion, it very quickly became obvious that the male was an alt of the Domme. I confronted her with my suspicions, and she admitted as much. The whole plan was for this sub or switchy guy to get a woman to dominate him. I don't know if this new hypno-Domme is doing the same thing, but it feels like exactly the same situation. Even if it turns out not to be, why should I, a submissive person, start Domming someone I don't even know?

On yet another occasion, I was 'hypnotised' (both parties roleplaying, and aware of it), then the so-called dominant hypnotist commanded me to Domme him. He tried this on me more than once, even after I'd told him it wasn't my thing. Another male 'tist encouraged me to dominate a different, female resident. I don't know if this was an alt of his, or a sub he couldn't be bothered to deal with himself.

Is this kind of 'bait-and-switch' submission common, or does it just happen to me? Do you consider it dishonest, or just another kind of roleplay?

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Personally I dont know that Hypo D/s thing is but it does seem like a bait and switch, Why dont they get a Dom in the first place instead of making a sub person do it. As a sub person when I do partake of the lifestyle it makes me very uncomfortable to control someone. Its out of my element. It's not right to make someone something they are not and naturally so.

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Kelli May wrote:

This is a combination of rant, question and discussion topic, so take it as you like.

Something I enjoy in SL is hypnotic D/s, with me very much on the submissive side. I don't always trance well, so sometimes I'm roleplaying the hypnosis (my submission is genuine, however). If the hypnotist wants a genuine subject, not a roleplayer, then I don't push myself on them.

Recently I was hypnotised by a Domme, and encouraged to let her take ownership of me. Almost immediately the focus of the hypnosis changed. She mentioned her husband (a resident I didn't know, but had seen at hypno D/s sims). She suggested I introduce myself, seduce him, and help her dominate him.

Alarm bells immediately rang for me. I've had a similar approach used before... a Domme seduces me, then tries to get me to dominate a male resident. On that occasion, it very quickly became obvious that the male was an alt of the Domme. I confronted her with my suspicions, and she admitted as much. The whole plan was for this sub or switchy guy to get a woman to dominate him. I don't know if this new hypno-Domme is doing the same thing, but it feels like exactly the same situation. Even if it turns out not to be, why should I, a submissive person, start Domming someone I don't even know?

On yet another occasion, I was 'hypnotised' (both parties roleplaying, and aware of it), then the so-called dominant hypnotist commanded me to Domme him. He tried this on me more than once, even after I'd told him it wasn't my thing. Another male 'tist encouraged me to dominate a different, female resident. I don't know if this was an alt of his, or a sub he couldn't be bothered to deal with himself.

Is this kind of 'bait-and-switch' submission common, or does it just happen to me? Do you consider it dishonest, or just another kind of roleplay?

I am submissive, so it would go against what is inside me to even think of Domming someone else, even hypnotised I would not be able to do it. To me, this is a dishonest practice from someone who hasn't a clue what being a Dom/me really is.

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I am submissive, so it would go against what is inside me to even think of Domming someone else, even hypnotised I would not be able to do it. To me, this is a dishonest practice from someone who hasn't a clue what being a Dom/me really is.

Couldnt have said it better!

 

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I'd call it extraordinarily dishonest and deceptive.  If the relationship isn't built from the first moment on mutual trust and truthfulness it'd be a bad idea to continue it in any way.

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That sure sounds like bait-and-switch to me. I'm glad your alarm bells went off immediately. By sitting on problems like this, one runs the risk of committing wait-and-b*i*t*c*h, which isn't any prettier.

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Everyone lies on the Internet.  Imo, you are asking this advice in the wrong place, but I am not so sure where 'it' can be asked.   How is it possible for you to be 'sure' of anyone that responds to this thread as they, too, play SL *thier* way?  Unless they write exactly what you want to read...  I will not.   It is your imagination; run with it anywhere *you* want to go with it.  

 

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Storm Clarence wrote:

Everyone lies on the Internet.  Imo, you are asking this advice in the wrong place, but I am not so sure where 'it' can be asked.   How is it possible for you to be 'sure' of anyone that responds to this thread as they, too, play SL *thier* way?  Unless they write exactly what you want to read...  I will not.   It is your imagination; run with it anywhere *you* want to go with it.  

 

Thanks. I wasn't really asking advice; I just wanted it out there and off my chest. I can't believe there's anywhere better to bring it up. I put it as a question because that's the quickest way to provoke a response.

To everyone else who responded, thank you too. It's reasurring that I'm not the only one to think this is a weird way to act.

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Dear Kelli.

its good that you got suspicious, i would have done the same thing. Specially in sl 99% of the people are fake anyways. there are even doms dragging their female alts as subs. so dont really bother and keep your eyes open. have fun and take care, hugs.

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I'm with Storm on this one, to an extent. If he/she wants to engage switches in RP, by all means she/he should do so. My only thought is that if it is serious ie heading for a real relationship it should be built on trust.

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Kelli May wrote:

Is this kind of 'bait-and-switch' submission common, or does it just happen to me? Do you consider it dishonest, or just another kind of roleplay?

 Good day, dear...

I do not know if this kind of behavior is common or not, but I can see how it happens. It could be a thrill for the Domme to have their new submissive dominate either an alt or an uncooperative slave. I have never participated in hypnosis D/s myself though to have more than an educated guess on this.

Is it dishonest...the main question should be once Mistress told you what she wanted did you tell her that you aren't interested in that? (that is merely my opinion, of course). Everyone has their own kinks....I had someone come to my home a few days ago because I was looking for a certain kink, then flat out asked me if she could be my slave. I told her what I want and if you don't like it, you are welcome to leave.

A wiser person (a lady who posts quite often) than I once wrote here that it is the slave in the D/s relationship who ultimately has the power. If this Mistress presented what she wanted and it was not your interest...you don't have to do it..even under "hypnosis". My opinion is to stop playing with her and find someone else.

 (I hope this all makes sense and I'M not totally rambling)

Good luck, dear girl

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Storm Clarence wrote:

/me highlights his "hair"


HAIR?? Have you seen my picture?? :matte-motes-sunglasses-3:

 

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Leia36 wrote:

/me butters up a
jumbo plug

Sounds kinky...  I can see you read my 'endowment' thread.

I hope you don't 'bait and switch' -- you know, use "I can't believe it's not butter" butter.  

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It's highly dishonest, Kelli, in several respects:

  1. The domme attempted to influence you while you were in trance, without discussing your desires with you ahead of time
  2. The domme was more interested in her own desires than yours.  Not the mark of a good domme
  3. The man you were to dominate was her alt.  That's the worst of it, for me.

It would have been much better if this person would just be a submissive male and go looking for a domme.  There are plenty of places to find one; he does not have to try to make his own.

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