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danicah

Do some people not like to cuddle?

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No haven't had the pleasure to meet him yet ;)

I made it as a 'homemade' gif file.. I made the pictures in photoshop, then moved them to ImageReady and made them moving right, then created them into a gif file.. ;)

I would gladly make you one.

Blessings

Lis

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Efurou wrote:

I understand the girl who did not want to cuddle.

Cuddling in sl is boring. When my avatar sits in a static pose like that - without any emoting (role playing) going on  that describes things that happen - I get bored at staring at the pixel people. I usually begin to cam around, look at all kinds of stuff in the enviroment - while I might chat with the person at the same time.

If the person who did not want to cuddle was in role play - why did her partner not chat with her in IMs. There is plenty of time to chat when one waits for the next emote. I do that all the time....no need to have my avatar parked on a couch in a cuddling pose. Multitasking ftw!

This.

Kind of dull to sit in front of the computer and stare at two cartoon characters who are busy doing absolutely -NOTHING- while you chat away in IMs. Even worse when the other person wants to "feel the moment" and has no desire to even chat.

It is -not at all- like RL cuddling.

Mind you I'm a bit too energetic for that also. Got to be doing something, thinking something, saying something, watching something - or falling asleep.

 

I chat with friends in IMs all the time while we both go about doing things and playing about in SL. When I meet friends, we rez stuff, walk about, chatter, and so on. I'm notorious for changing my outfit once every few seconds while chatting with people - just got to "stay in motion" or faceplant. :P

(There's a reason I'm a neko / cat in SL.)

 

Even my friends who insist on that /hug emote - over time I've ended up hanging out with those friends less and less. Its always been kind of a 'why do you insist on locking my avatar down for several minutes?'

(I don't like couples dances for the same reason - mostly too slow and too static, when on a dance floor in SL I often move around a bit, and usually have a more vibrant and emotive set of dances going.)

Likewise my 'AO' is -VERY- animated. I've got once of those bouncy pacing glancing about, twirling, jumping in place sorts of AOs.

 

If I want to to stare at still pictures and chat, I can get a friend on instant message something or other while browsing Renderosity.

 

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I dont know how to get ImageReady. it just came along when I got Photoshop 7..

I am old fasion with my photoshop, I dont like the new versions LOL so I stick to the old one.. :D

But give me a hollar anytime...

.........................................................................................................................................................

I really dont think its a question about real men cuddle or not... A real man, or unreal <---whatever that is LOL

will ofcause cuddle when he feels like it and has feelings for the one he cuddles with.. Just like any other human being.. Some wants to do it much, some wants to do it less... Some will in public, some want it private...

I think the question in OP's post was mostly why the guy wanted to cuddle and she didnt...

My answer: She was busy... thats bascely it... isnt it? *grinss

Hugs

Lis

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Imageready was discontinued when Adobe bought Macromedia. Photoshop now comes bundled with Fireworks.

Sadly, they haven't fully changed Fireworks to work well with Photoshop. There are a few tools which just work in peculiar ways...


For most people, if you are not already 'hooked' on Photoshop, get Gimp. Its free and just as good. If I could unlearn Photoshop enough to figure out Gimp, I would... it'd save me hundreds of dollars...

 

cont. where I left off above:

I'm not really a cuddler in RL either in part from my background. The sort of background that also makes you tense when your back is exposed or you hear loud banging noises (first time one of my neighbors drove by my new house in their somewhat noisy car, I jumped under some thick furniture to avoid any stray bullets... reflex action).

My mind is also constantly busy - and I will fall asleep if forced to be 'still' for too long.

There was a time when I was very good at falling asleep "on a dime" and waking up fully at the slightest noise or motion - because I had to. That comes with a bundle of things - one of which is that extended moments of 'time wasting' with someone, even some I care deeply for (been in a RL relationship for almost 20 years now), makes me edgy.

 

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Efurou wrote:

I understand the girl who did not want to cuddle.

Cuddling in sl is boring. When my avatar sits in a static pose like that - without any emoting (role playing) going on  that describes things that happen - I get bored at staring at the pixel people. I usually begin to cam around, look at all kinds of stuff in the enviroment - while I might chat with the person at the same time.

If the person who did not want to cuddle was in role play - why did her partner not chat with her in IMs. There is plenty of time to chat when one waits for the next emote. I do that all the time....no need to have my avatar parked on a couch in a cuddling pose. Multitasking ftw!

For me it is safer not to cuddle too much, actually. This one time - I was talked into just sitting in pose and "cuddling." Of course I got bored and restless after about 5 minutes. I started clicking on everything in cam range - next thing you know, I had deleted half the house! True story.

 

I didn't really read this all that carefully the first time through, but now it's been quoted recently by at least one other post and I read both yours and at least one of the ones that quoted you. Clearly, there's a variety of approaches taken by people in this thread but I failed to even take that into consideration.

I based all my views and my one post on MY minimal but not nonexistent experience with cuddling in SL. What you and a couple others have described is something entirely different. In your case the cuddling was role-play. That sort of role-play (acting out some kind of relationship) is something I've never done and to be honest probably wouldn't enjoy not being a particular fan of organized RP in general. Others have talked about being stuck in static poses while they IM other people. That's also completely different from my limited experience. What I was doing had everything to do with the person I was with. I'd not only not be IM'ing other people, I'd probably respond with "Not now" to anyone who IM'd me (or, if a close friend, with "Not now, you IDIOT!").

I can fully understand that just cuddling as 'something to do' as opposed to some of the other interesting things one can find poseballs for in SL would be a less than productive way to spend time. Way less, actually.

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Czari Zenovka wrote:


Leia36 wrote:

Cuddling might not be for everyone, but for us its just about our favorite thing in SL, that or dancing. We share and we really feel one another, time ...flies when we are snuggling, I feel him so close, just there, my thoughts he reads, we often say the same thing at the same time, the glass fades,

I feel him...so close, so right. Sex has little to do with it, it's a meeting of our minds where we share each other and it gets better every day.  It is a gentle place where after a long day of dealing with everything life can throw at us we can share with no distraction or stress. It's become our happy place.

I see the joke, but seriously, do real men hug?..Yes overwhelmingly yes, Its all around you every day, open your eyes and see.

I guess I was fortunate to find a like-minded partner (who loved to cuddle and dance) early on in my SL.  The reason we are no longer is valid but when I read a post like your's, Leia, I keep hoping that somewhere out there is a cuddler for me.  (Well and a lot more, but the discussion is currently cuddling. :matte-motes-bashful-cute:)

 

Ahh Czari, its not the why or the when, but the who....They are out there and as we can see from this thread, both sexes are fairly represented and of whatever orientation, really it comes down to the who. If its your thing, then have fun, if not, have fun,  *curls my toes grinning

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Leia36 wrote:

Ahh Czari, its not the why or the when, but the who....


Yep. And it's not the how either. From a long gentle embrace on a crescent moon in the sky to a quick playful tousling of hair in IM across SL, cuddling comes in many forms.

What's important is that, for however long it lasts, you've given your attention and made the connection.

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Yeah, I don't really like the cuddling as well, too boring indeed.

Like someone said I'm not into SL for that.

 

Oh, and I've seen people in SL relationships and when it goes wrong,

I spare myself the drama.

 

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Yeah, I hear you about the dances Pussycat.

Sometimes I allow people to dance with my avi because they are friends.

But with that and sex outside of RP I often find my mind wandering

and me doing other things in the mean time.

(While still trying to give my friend some attention).

 

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danicah wrote:

Just an example: The girl is on her RP account, spends time there until late at night... and then her partner on her alt wants to spend a little time just cuddling before bed time... but she keeps stalling and then ends up being too tired. So they dont get to cuddle much.

 

Her alt? So, both avs are female avs? And one hates to cuddle?

There is a possibility the one who won't cuddle is a real life male - a lot of hetero males play "lesbians" in Second Life. Sounds like it to me, but who knows. If her partner cares, she might want to consider that possibility. (And to some it won't matter.)

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Melita Magic wrote:

Her alt? So, both avs are female avs? And one hates to cuddle?

There is a possibility the one who won't cuddle is a real life male - a lot of hetero males play "lesbians" in Second Life. Sounds like it to me, but who knows. If her partner cares, she might want to consider that possibility. (And to some it won't matter.)


I understand it differently..

She has two accounts.. her own where she is doing the RP on, and then an Alt she uses to cuddles with her partner...

= a cuddle Alt-account and a none-cuddle RP account...

Then when she is logged in and is busy RP'ing, he wants her to log in as her Alt insted (where she has the partner) and come play cuddle with him...

*Madam shrugs her shoulders and wonders if the partner only is allowed to play cuddle on the Alt account...

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Cuddle animated couch ='s sex couch unless I know (i.e look up the creators store or the item and find they make a model without it) and basically....yeah, I assume it is the precurser to sex animations found in some I see. Why do I think this? I don't do sex in SL, but I see the items and check out many many items from many industries and read bits of the descriptions etc. and have checked out some stores or scripts. They do have sex stuff in some, but I do know many do not as well. But, I assume it unless I find out otherwise. Maybe the person really does not want the guy to start humping her because he knows a certain animation she should try and then it ruins it all. She might be all crying and hates it, or is simply defient. maybe in her homeland it is a insult to ask a women such a thing. I mean, some places you shuold not be even talking to a women unless the parents have approved and made sure he is of good character! They may also have a hubby accross the room! There are lots of reason, attitudes, thoughts.

I suggest they just ask. Plus, maybe they also need to ask questions related to some specific area or other to find out other things that might be cultural or any number of things to put thier mind at ease. OR, buy a fern and talk to it! I mean, you could make baloon animals and jokes....maybe they would like this more....maybe they want you to threaten them with a gun and they are a spy in another country that is waiting for a special word, gesture or time period......they may think you are agent 785-035, code named JackTrap10Fernman.....you didn't place a fern by the fireplace yet...so no cuddling, wich leads to a conversation about the keyboards and night time darkness...so, no secret coordinates for you mister...and let me guess......you forgot the chinaware! Sad stuff....geesh, the spies these days. /me shakes head and leaves the thread

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Poenald Palen wrote:

Cuddle animated couch ='s sex couch unless I know (i.e look up the creators store or the item and find they make a model without it) and basically....yeah, I assume it is the precurser to sex animations found in some I see. Why do I think this? I don't do sex in SL, but I see the items and check out many many items from many industries and read bits of the descriptions etc. and have checked out some stores or scripts. They do have sex stuff in some, but I do know many do not as well. But, I assume it unless I find out otherwise. Maybe the person really does not want the guy to start humping her because he knows a certain animation she should try and then it ruins it all. She might be all crying and hates it, or is simply defient. maybe in her homeland it is a insult to ask a women such a thing. I mean, some places you shuold not be even talking to a women unless the parents have approved and made sure he is of good character! They may also have a hubby accross the room! There are lots of reason, attitudes, thoughts.

I suggest they just ask. Plus, maybe they also need to ask questions related to some specific area or other to find out other things that might be cultural or any number of things to put thier mind at ease. OR, buy a fern and talk to it! I mean, you could make baloon animals and jokes....maybe they would like this more....maybe they want you to threaten them with a gun and they are a spy in another country that is waiting for a special word, gesture or time period......they may think you are agent 785-035, code named JackTrap10Fernman.....you didn't place a fern by the fireplace yet...so no cuddling, wich leads to a conversation about the keyboards and night time darkness...so, no secret coordinates for you mister...and let me guess......you forgot the chinaware! Sad stuff....geesh, the spies these days. /me shakes head and leaves the thread

wut?

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