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Dappyy

I miss him so much ,any help...?

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Ok so first off,this is my BROTHER'S account.Not mine.

 

It all started when we met on a sim,we chatted and became friends.I didn't fall in love with him immediately,but he was sooo cute.He said we really think the same way ...He told me also that I'm not like other girls,obsessive and superficial..It was like a dream come true,no other guy made me feel the way he did.

Then we used to hang out everyday,I felt so happy with him and I couldn't believe when....

HE LEFT.Not forever though.4 months.I was so sad ,I even tried to cancel my account,SL didn't mean anything to me anymore.I left SL for a bit too.He then returned to the game and told me he was busy in rl ..After awhile ,he left again.I feel so empty.AGAIN.

 

Will he do that all the time?The leaving?I didn't tell him,but I'm really in love with him.I don't think he knows that,because I used to friendzone him.And,most important: Do you think it's my fault?What should I do,cause I can't think of anything to make him come back.I hope he's not mad at me for friendzoning him.

 

 

I'm screwed.I'm going to leave sl if he doesn't return.:(:matte-motes-not-entertained:

   

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I feel sorry for you Dappyy. It is always difficult (if not impossible) to give advice to others when we don't know you or your man, nor the details of of specific relationship. 4 months is quite a long time especially in SL. it may be true he's been busy in RL. Or not, sorry. But he came back. OK, now he left again and you are devastated which is only natural. Nobody but him knows if he'll return or not. I know how much it hurts and is hard to cope.

I can only speak from my own experience. My partner vanished for 4 weeks but it was for one terribly reason, he has a cancer and was in hospital. I've been waiting. I've been trying to open myself to other interests in SL. I learnt to build, I explored, I made new friends.

Only your heart can tell you what you will do with your SL. I cannot speak of gold and I am no one so knowledgable about human feelings to tell you what to do. But if I was you, I would not leave SL, at least not now, not until he returns (sounds to me he will one day or the other as he already did) and until you can have an open conversation with him about your relationship.
In the meantime, keep yourself as busy as you can. You'll maybe be surprise to see how one day you wake up and don't feel such a heavy and painful loss anymore. You have to be prepared to the eventuality that he does not come back at all too. It hurts, but you can overcome.

Wishing you the best and hugs you Dappyy.

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Dappyy wrote:

Ok so first off,this is my alt.

 

It all started when we met on a sim,we chatted and became friends.I didn't fall in love with him immediately,but he was sooo cute.He said we really think the same way ...He told me also that I'm not like other girls,obsessive and superficial..It was like a dream come true,no other guy made me feel the way he did.

Then we used to hang out everyday,I felt so happy with him and I couldn't believe when....

HE LEFT.Not forever though.4 months.I was so sad ,I even tried to cancel my account,SL didn't mean anything to me anymore.I left SL for a bit too.He then returned to the game and told me he was busy in rl ..After awhile ,he left again.I feel so empty.AGAIN.

 

Will he do that all the time?The leaving?I didn't tell him,but I'm really in love with him.I don't think he knows that,because I used to friendzone him.And,most important: Do you think it's my fault?What should I do,cause I can't think of anything to make him come back.I hope he's not mad at me for friendzoning him.

 

 

I'm screwed.I'm going to leave sl if he doesn't return.
:(
:matte-motes-not-entertained:

   

hold up.. you aren't BF/GF and you are freaking this much? Obsessive much? You say you friendzoned him and you are going to leave SL if he keeps doing RL things. Do you know anything about his RL? Why does he keep leaving?

to answer your question, no its not your fault. he obviously has RL things to do. He could be spending time with his wife and kids. You did friendzone his butt after all.

 

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You just need to find something else or some other people to focus on. And mute him .. in case he comes back, well, again. Or just, delete your account and make a new one. Then you cannot trick yourself checking if he does return..

You can justify it all you want, telling yourself you caused this by putting him in the friendszone and what not you think you may have done wrong .. if he would feel the same .. he would be there, hunting you down ;) well in a nice way ..

Move on, time heals all wounds, well not all but yours in not in that category... 

 

Just.. you know, what I think

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After a view of your profile and what you say you promote, you are not even worth one more sentence. Closing your account as another mentioned sounds like a gem of an idea to me.

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oh right .. well .. doesnt look like the dappyy knows what she is promoting there for real... if he/she had her teeth kicked in before, he/she wouldnt cry about a sl friendszone guy not loggin anymore ..

i wouldnt take that statement too seriously .. well gosh.. i hear you tho, seems like someone needs to grow up

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Valerie your reply is the most helpful.Thanks alot!:)I really didn't feel like writing here,because I haven't done it before,but I felt like it was time to do it.

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Sorry,this is my brother's account,I didn't feel like writing from my real one.I didn't want anyone I know in SL to find this,you understand?!

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Dappyy wrote:

Yeah I know,lol,he doesn't have a wife and kids,but I suppose he has a GF in rl.

How do you KNOW he doesn't have a wife and kids? Have you met him in RL? Been to his house? Thai is SL.. PEOPLE LIE!!!!

Speaking of, you started by saying this was your alt.. now it's your brothers account. A mysterious brother who happens to have a female av.

How old are you? 17.. 18? Go to a club and meet someone. Go to the library and meet a nice intellegent young man.  Don't use SL aas a dating site. It will only end badly.

For each successful relationship that comes from SL there are thousands of horrible failures.

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K so in fact,this IS my brother's account but I use it when I'm bored xD,so it's my alt too.

I'm 20,btw.And I don't use SL as a dating website,fyi.

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I have his facebook profile.:P

A friend of mine gave it to me.That's where I know from,he doesn't have a wife and kids.

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Dappyy wrote:

I have his facebook profile.
:P

A friend of mine gave it to me.That's where I know from,he doesn't have a wife and kids.

I'm fairly certain the sharing of someone's rl info without their consent is a no-no. If it isn't, it should be :smileysurprised:

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my honest advice to you would be to get off the computer and go meet some real boys..

i am serious..if you are falling for this guy on here..it's not healthy when he doesn't even know it..

 

no matter if you are shy or what..the only way to become unshy in the real world is to get out there and get around people..

you won't ever be happy with this guy because it sounds like he likes to part time it in sl..maybe he ducks out when he feels it's time he needs a break from the fantasy..

i'm not trying to tell you  to get a life or anything like that..

 

i'm just saying..you seem to be setting yourself  up for a long road of waiting around and living your life for others you really don't honestly and truely know..

 

when the power goes out you will be alone if he is online or not..where in a real relationship..the power going out when with someone can lead to some pretty good things ..

don't be one that waits around for others to get your life moving..be one that makes your own wheels turn..it's a hell of a lot more rewarding..

 

 

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"don't be one that waits around for others to get your life moving..be one that makes your own wheels turn..it's a hell of a lot more rewarding.."

Awesome and truer words never spoken.


To the OP - move on. People leave all the time. Sounds callous I know, but seriously, after years of it, you get used to it. never really stops bugging, but it stops beign a shock.

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Your brother's account, an alt, you use it when you're bored... can't you get your own account? It's free ffs...

You know it sounds to me like you are either confused, naive. Facebook? Gee folks makes up Facebook pages all the time.

Truth is you don't know a thing about this person's RL or at least not as much as you think you know.

You wanted him as a friend, grand. Now it's time to grow up and move on.

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I hope you can learn from this experience.  It's nice to think that you fell in love with this amazing person and blah blah blah, but honestly?  YOU DID NOT KNOW HIM.    I was with my SL partner for a year and spent hundreds of hours with him --  not only in SL, but also on Skype, instant messenger, email, etc, etc.  I thought that i knew him extremely well. To cut a long story short, he wasn't the person he represented himself to be AT ALL.  I consider myself reasonably astute and a decent judge of character, but he sure had me fooled. 

No need to give up on SL or think about closing your (brother's? -- not sure how that works) account.  Just be a little more cautious next time. 

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I don't think you have to take SL seriously. From the strat we knew that RL and SL are two different worlds. If our partners are busy with RL then we cannot do anything to stop that because that's the reality and SL is just a leisure.

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I agree. Move on sweetie. What ever his reason is. At the very best he is going to randomly leave you for long periods of time. That's not someone I want to invest in. I know not all sl people are liars but a lot of men will make up excuses as to why they have to leave for so long. Mine was in the "hospital" and found out he wasn't. He was using his alt. Not saying that's happening to you.  Just saying in general. Dappy the best thing is to remember this is a game to guys mainly and move on.

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Sephina Frostbite wrote:

I agree. Move on sweetie. What ever his reason is. At the very best he is going to randomly leave you for long periods of time. That's not someone I want to invest in. I know not all sl people are liars but a lot of
men
people
will make up excuses as to why they have to leave for so long. Mine was in the "hospital" and found out he wasn't. He was using his alt. Not saying that's happening to you.  Just saying in general. Dappy the best thing is to remember this is a game to guys mainly and move on.

Fixed that for you.  It is not strictly a male problem. 

 

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