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Belladona Viper

Dislike the Real Photo Option

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Second Life for me is really a second one,I never mix anything from SL and RL,I don't mind when people do it,but for me it really breaks the magic when someone puts their RL picture on the profile and it's very different of what I thought.It annoys me also when people want to know more about my Real Life.

What are you guys opinions about it?

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The subject is discussed often. The simple answer is that if you don't care to mix SL and RL you are probably not going to enjoy being in the company of those who do and it's best to make that clear right at the start.

I have no data other than anecdotal, but I suspect that most here (meaning in SL) consider asking for RL info varying degrees of rude, with the amount of rudeness inversely proportional to the length of the acquaintance.

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Actually this question for me is a double-edged weapon since it is hard sometimes to know what is refered to rl and what  to sl. It is usually hard to communicate without knowing the level of person's intelligens I think. It is about  asking rl interests or hobbies or anything else connected with the day activity, likes or dislikes. It seems that sl is more connected with rl. Mostly in sl we are more like real in behaviour and interests then in rl)) Do not mind when ppl place their real pics, I am not usually surfing others profiles, but hate when asked to check it and in the end see some pornography.... also when the thin line crossed and there go questions about boyfriends, rl pics or other really personal stuff. But still personal stuff for every one is not the same so...)

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I don't mind it in the old style profiles where SL and RL are on different tabs, that way I can chose to look - or not.

I don't like how they put both SL and RL on the About tab in the web based profiles so that looking is somewhat unavoidable (I am not *that* disciplined) unless someone wants to totally avoid the profile.

F

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I don't like to mix Rl and SL together but there seams to be time that some bleed through is necessary, like RL age, general time zone and  what not. As to profiles and photos; whatever is posted to profile or in a lot of cases what's not posted, helps me figure out what their style of "game" is in SL. But when I do see a RL photo and then look at the AV, a lot of times it makes me chuckle. It's true that no matter how we age, we always remain young at heart, some younger than others. :) 

I do understand about "breaking the magic." I have the same issue when a novel is made into a movie. I never think the cast picked match what I've envisioned in my head. 

My biggest peeve in SL is more aimed at newcomers, although there are plenty of old timers who do this too; who constantly ask for RL info far beyond what I've provided in my profile. I'm not here to date and even if I was, I wouldn't be giving out that much info to a total stranger. I don't know if this is a cross cultural issue or not but I have wondered if there isn't some cultural factors at play in this.  

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I'm not playing a role. Griffin is me and I am Griffin. I'm ok with mixing RL and SL.

I don't go around asking for people's RL info, but I'll freely share my own RL info with people that I know and/or feel comfortable with, within reason.

I have my RL photo in my profile. If you choose to not put your RL photo in yours, that's fine. I have lots of friends who don't.

If the "magic" is broken because someone looks at it... Sorry, but I'm not here for you.

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For me its simple.  I'm the same in SL as RL, but i don't share my RL stuff with anyone who asks.  They have to be a friend AND have to have earned my trust before i tell them anything specific.  I will tell them general things like my interests etc. but no RL identifying information.  I am quite upfront about it too, and state this in my RL section of my profile.  If someone asks i just tell them the same.  If they get offended, it is their problem not mine.

As far as pic, I don't care if someone has them in their profile, just don't dump them on me without warning.  I don't feel anyone is obligated to have a RL pic in their profile either.  Also realize that the RL pic you see has a big chance of being a pic of someone else or ripped from the net there is no way to know.  I've actually seen people with pics that i have seen before ont he net in other places.  So don't believe everything you see.

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In terms of friends and getting to know people, I don't mind sharing RL info. I mean I'm not gonna say, "Here's my address - c'mon over" or "This is my RL surname, look me up" - but sharing little details and insights is alright with me.

That said, when it comes to RP or the pixel sex bit - I absolutely loathe any RL involvement. I am never gonna be the girl who sits at her desk and rubs a few off while someone dictates to me how fast. Further, I have no desire to hear anyone breathe heavy while they tiddle their lil maggot on their other end, either.

In the same vein, I'm not a fan of voice chat or involving RL that way, regardless of how long I know a person. I don't wanna hear your TV/radio blaring in the background and I'm quite certain you don't wanna  hear my kids fighting on my end. 

ETA: I don't mind sharing a RL picture and have, but yeah I agree. It does ruin the fantasy element.

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Belladona Viper wrote: '... it really breaks the magic when someone puts their RL picture on the profile and it's very different...'

So many things can break the magic... that's just one of them and, one could say, ideally not the most important. Any person you meet might at first, either by virtue of a temporary good mood or a carefully faked nice behaviour, look like the most charming, genuine, caring and friendly individual, regardless of either SL or RL appearances... and then after a few days the shoe or the mask drops, and you find out otherwise. Sometimes *extremely* so.

With that in mind, a not-quite-as-imagined RL look might as well be the least of your worries :smileywink:

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I added my rl picture to my profile when I first started because I thought that was the thing to do seeing the 1st. life tab. And I have just left it there since. I have never been bothered to much about online friends knowing what I look like or even my rl information. Trough mmo's I've made some very good rl friends which I go see once in a while. Makes for a good excuse to see different countries :matte-motes-bashful-cute-2:

But I did realize, quite quickly, that SL is different from anything else I've experienced online and I do respect other peoples wish for privacy and to separate sl from rl. And there is the whole factor of immersion for those who want totally live out their second life. I am not as trusting here with my information as I've been before. I might be generalizing but I trust the typical grown up mmo player as I am one myself but on sl you do get a lot more different types which makes me more wary. I could be totally wrong though. I will agree though it was better with a separate tab for first life stuff so you could choose not to look.

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I live my sl, the way I live my rl...the way I want to. I don't meddle into others' affairs and I'd prefer they not meddle into mine.

I think it's grand we ALL have that option even more here in SL. You have the option to not look at my rl photo(or my proile at all, lol) and I have the option to put it in there if I so choose. I think it's pretty darn cool actually.

I don't often mix *everything* rl with sl. As in, not everyone knows my rl name, where I am from, my age, etc.. etc... but some do. I respect that others prefer not to share ANYTHING. I find that a mutual respect is best. Presuming to believe you know what's best for all, however, is never best. I don't mind one bit if others don't want to share their info at all or mingle the two lives. That is completely and utterly up to them. It would never "ruin" anything for me if they did, or did not. My sl is my sl, regardless of what anyone does or does not do. Much the same that my rl is my rl no matter what.

But I will admit I'm a huge profile perv, and I do enjoy looking at the pics some people choose to put in their rl tab. Even if it's not an actual pic of themselves. I enjoy looking at them. I also enjoy looking at ones in the picks too though. :)

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As much as I have no desire to put real world info in my profile, I don't see the harm in having an option. 

I do wish however that I could somehow hide myself completely from losers who are just out looking for a cam show. That's what really ruins the magic for me.

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Griffin Ceawlin wrote:

I'm not playing a role. Griffin is me and I am Griffin. I'm ok with mixing RL and SL.

I don't go around asking for people's RL info, but I'll freely share my own RL info with people that I know and/or feel comfortable with, within reason.

I have my RL photo in my profile. If you choose to not put your RL photo in yours, that's fine. I have lots of friends who don't.

If the "magic" is broken because someone looks at it... Sorry, but I'm not here for you.

Exactly!   What Griffin said ^^^  

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Sextoy Gynoid wrote:

I do wish however that I could somehow hide myself completely from losers who are just out looking for a cam show.

I think your name is the attraction to such men lol

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Celestiall Nightfire wrote:


Griffin Ceawlin wrote:

I'm not playing a role. Griffin is me and I am Griffin. I'm ok with mixing RL and SL.

I don't go around asking for people's RL info, but I'll freely share my own RL info with people that I know and/or feel comfortable with, within reason.

I have my RL photo in my profile. If you choose to not put your RL photo in yours, that's fine. I have lots of friends who don't.

If the "magic" is broken because someone looks at it... Sorry, but I'm not here for you.

Exactly!   What Griffin said ^^^  

This ^^.

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Of course I realized what my name would attract, what I didn't realize was that hundreds of noobs were going to sign up several years later for no purpose other than to beg for cam shows.

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Its the internet! Naming yourself like something from a cheap dirty pornside attracts people who now want the same stuff from you....a free cam show :catwink:

 

On Topic: I only named my country in real life informations, so people would know English is not my native language and they can also speak German with me. But I would never put a real life photo in my profile. First because I don't really like being on photos and second because the IMs an attractive female avatar can get sometimes are already weird enough.

I don't mind it when others want to share more of their real life on their profile, but they shouldn't think then that this wouldn't influence others view on them. Also I sometimes wonder why people put the most unattractive photos of themselves in their profile.

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Sextoy Gynoid wrote:

Of course I realized what my name would attract, what I didn't realize was that hundreds of noobs were going to sign up several years later for no purpose other than to beg for cam shows.

years later?

i don't remember a time they haven't asked for that..even before voice was added to the grid people hounding to skype or cam..i kept wondering if my name said something else in another language LOL

.

 

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Syo Emerald wrote:

Its the internet! Naming yourself like something from a cheap dirty pornside attracts people who now want the same stuff from you....a free cam show :catwink:

 

On Topic: I only named my country in real life informations, so people would know English is not my native language and they can also speak German with me. But I would never put a real life photo in my profile. First because I don't really like being on photos and second because the IMs an attractive female avatar can get sometimes are already weird enough.

I don't mind it when others want to share more of their real life on their profile, but they shouldn't think then that this wouldn't influence others view on them.
Also I sometimes wonder why people put the most unattractive photos of themselves in their profile.

It's entirely possible some people don't view that picture, or for that matter themselves, as unattractive.

Also I'm not real certain that everyone who puts a rl photo in there is doing so to influence how others feel about them, necessarily. Yeah sure some might, the same way that some might put a certain kind of photo(good, beautiful, bad, ugly) in their sl tab as well, for the same reason. But I don't believe everyone does.

I find it just slightly insulting that others believe anyone putting any sort of rl info out there, be it a photo, name, actual sex, age, location, whatever have you, is "ruining" their sl. How can someone else ruin sl for you? The simple answer is, they cannot. You're letting them, for lack of a better phrase here.

Why do people care so very much what others choose to do with their own sl. Some of us very much enjoy sl the way we like to enjoy it. We don't intrude on your backyard anymore than we'd enjoy you intruding on ours, without being asked. Though I'm quite certain at least some of us wouldn't mind a visit. But don't come in my yard and then **bleep** about my landscaping, that's just poor taste. You're the one who chose to visit in the first place.

It was probably not the best idea to openly join this thread, lol. It's lead to some not so nice messages about having a rl photo. None of which were very appreciated, though I must admit I found a couple rather funny.

Some people really do need to mind their own beeswax and stop pretending they know what the "best way to play sl" actually is. I know the best way to enjoy sl for me, and I am doing it, every single day. I strongly urge others to do the same. Perhaps even find a hobby within sl if you're finding that the way others choose to enjoy their time here is infringing on your "magic".

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I don't have a real life photo in my profile for just this reason.  I figure,  if I get close enough to someone - I can always share that outside of SL,  and this way - I don't blow someone's fantasy in the process.   That being said,  I also have it noted that...  I'm okay with sharing real life info,  and I'm okay with not.  Really, this is just a personal preference.  To each his own - no right or wrong.

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Wow cool down!

I'm definitly not the one how cries over someone who puts a real life picture in their profile. Nobody can ruin my entire SL with that and so I don't blame anyone for anything like that. I'm just sometimes wondering about some things I noticed while reading profiles.

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