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A question to the stripers, dancer and escorts. Well anyone really.


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So I met this guy nice guy or I thought he was. He was a newbie at the time so I kind of helped him with sl. We talked for a long time flirted. He knew I was a dancer/ escort at the time and it wasn't an issue. Well then he said he liked me so I stopped escorting. I told him we are just friends but out of respect I wont escort. He said as long as I dance its not an issue. So I get a message from him saying he's upset that I dance. I told him it helps me pay for things as well as my rent on my house. Its nothing personal. That's when he got all nasty with me for being a dancer. Its not like it was new knowledge. He had no issue before now all of a sudden its an issue.

Have you had this happen before???

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And that's when you realize that just because he's an "Avatar" on screen .. he's still an a**h**e. Controlling, abusive, insecure behavior isn't limited to the flesh-n-bone world, it lives every place human beings share their emotions.

Thank him for the opportunity to see his real feelings .. and apply the "Mute" function. Even if it's not a permanent act on your part, it will educate him on the limits of his influence and his need to respect everyone .. no matter if they are pixels or biological in construction.

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People sometimes change their behavior once they get in a relationship. They can get better or they can get worse. It sounds like he has become possessive and paranoid. Once you see that, I say it's time to end the friendship because the genie is out of the bottle and you can't go back to the way it was. The upside is that you get to go back to work again and there will always be more people to meet. Maybe the next will turn out okay.

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Hello, i do not agree to the former answers.

I had this happen too and even she didn´t force me to stop i knew she doesn´t like it. So ... i had to decide what i want more and stopped dance/strip.

In buisness and private if 2 or more people enter a relation they cannot just go on as before. You have to find compromises and ways both/all can live with.

Him getting nasty and stuff sure wasn´t right but that does not make him an evil person, just jealous. You both should talk about why and what.

Anyway, some people are never happy so he better look for someone else who´s not in that buisness already.

Monti

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Sephina Frostbite wrote:

Have you had this happen before???

It's common enough. I would say it's commonplace that people find someone they like, except for a couple of smudges on their character. Rather than accepting them for who they are, it's fairly easy (and successful) to wait until emotions begin to be shared, and you begin to value their opinion. At this point it's considerably more persuasive to say "Look what we've spent time together making; you wouldn't want to have wasted our time and effort, would you?"

It uses guilt, behaviour-shaming, and emotional manipulation to 'change your mind', or risk losing something that they want you to want. It makes it sound as though you're to blame for his unhappiness, and that it will be your fault if the relationship fails. It's all a lie. There's plenty of good, decent ways to discuss serious subjects without resorting to these under-handed tricks.

Find someone who respects your decisions, and isn't betting on playing you for a fool.

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he sounds pretty selfish to me..did he even offer to pick up your bills for you until you could find another way..or even offer advice in that area?

 

i'll just guess and say..no way hozay lol

because that woudl take thinking about you rather than their selfish wants..

 

ya you did the best thing..kick him to the road hard and fast like he deserved...

anyone messing with anyone else's SL like that deserves a good kick in the shorts  hehehe

 

 

 

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If you're just friends and not even dating, I don't understand why he thinks it's any of his business at all, lol. Sure you can compromise sometimes in relationships, if something is more important to your partner than it is to yourself, but in this case I'd tell him to go f*** himself.

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So update is as what I would expect it. He is possessive then acts like he isn't. He wants me to chase him but what's to show no interest until someone else does. I was a fool pretty much. He said he interviewed me but I didn't pass. Guess being a dancer makes me less of a person. Darn he seemed so genuine. I know they rarely are but once and a while someone plays me like a fool. This is why I shouldn't have gave up being an escort at least when I get F%*ked I get paid. Thank you all for your advice,

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If he's willing to pay for your rent, buy you all the nice things you want, and cover all the costs of your account then he has the right to ask you to stop dancing.  Tell him you'll agree to stop dancing and escorting if he agrees to that.  If he does not agree then let him know this is how you pay your way in SL.

Then your attitude is "put up or shut up".  If he's not willing to step up to the boyfriend role, why should you step up to the girlfriend role?

Oh, and if he doesn't take the deal, he can start paying for your sex time too.  Fair is fair.

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Sephina Frostbite wrote:

He wouldn't pay for anything. He said he would a long time ago but it fell through.

Ahhh ... well, here is the answer. He wants all the benefits, all the companionship, friendship, support and good natured time spent chatting, but wants them all provided free and without any responsibility on his part. He wants things "given" to him but doesn't want to earn them .. or even return them in kind.

Yeah, pretty much explains him in a very clear and obvious way, doesn't it?

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Sephina Frostbite wrote:

Yes he pretty much wants his cake and eat it too. Ive seen what other girls write toto him. That is not a man looking for an exlusive relationship with me. He wants to make sure I am his but he his not mine. Not doing it.

No, he wants his cake and eat you too.

 

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Melita Magic wrote:

Every time I read the title of this thread I think "those poor candy stripers...how far they have fallen."

So this isn't about candy stripers having to take their clothes off on weekends for some extra Linden?

:P


 

The same thing crossed my mind and it reminded me of a very old but very funny movie with the best pair of candy stripers EVER. Not only that; it has stripers and strippers, as you can see from the trailer :-).

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